Yahoo Autos Question of the Day: How Do I Take Revenge On Asshat Parkers?
(Photo: The Mitzikin Revolution via Flickr)
According to Laura Gasiorowski, a criminal defense attorney at the Law Offices of Robert G. Stahl, LLC in New Jersey/New York, you don’t:
“People making rash and stupid decisions in the heat of the moment are the bread and butter of defense attorneys. Keying a car is not ‘just deserts,’ it’s a crime.
“In New Jersey, (for example) the charge would likely be criminal mischief, a fourth-degree indictable offense, with the possibility of incarceration, and the certainty of an arrest record and a painful hit to your wallet for the lawyer’s fees, the fines, and restitution to the car’s owner for the damage you caused.”
In other words, don’t do it. Many other states have similar laws that could land you in equally hot water. As for the fees, many states categorize damage to property worth less than $500 a misdemeanor, but anything worth greater than $500 a felony. So keying a 1984 Toyota Tercel could result in a fine, but keying a Lamborghini could land you in the state slammer and cost you your retirement fund.
(Photo: The Mitzikin Revolution via Flickr)
If that doesn’t turn you off, consider the ramifications if the driver catches you in the act. Sadly, people often get seriously injured fighting over things far less trivial than parking spaces, so it is always wise not to pick a fight with strangers. If it turns out that this person isn’t a stranger, your interaction could be even more awkward. And if they don’t see you in the act, you may still be caught via security cameras and viral cell phone videos; just ask Justin Bieber and Michael Phelps.
