How do you explain a cancer diagnosis to children?
There's nothing trivial about cancer - the very word is scary, and of course the condition can have dramatic effects - on the patient and those around them. And it can be specially hard to deal with in families with young children.
In her video message published earlier in March, Princess Kate said that she needed time to inform her three children Prince George (10), Princess Charlotte (8) and Prince Louis (5).
"It has taken us time to explain everything to George, Charlotte and Louis in a way that is appropriate for them, and to reassure them that I am going to be OK."
Cancer experts advise a similar approach because tend to children fill the gaps with their imagination if they are not given suitable explanations for a changed situation in the family. "Such thoughts can be more threatening than the reality," says the German Cancer Research Centre's advice page.
Providing honest information also strengthens children's trust. Conversely, if they later learn that important information was withheld from them, this can lead to mistrust, rejection and conflict.
The Cancer Research Centre's advice is that children should be informed at an early age. They are often very perceptive and can sense changes in the family. However, it is also important that the conversation is held once the diagnosis has been confirmed and the patient has had time to process their own initial reaction. "Families do not need to put themselves under pressure," the Cancer Research Centre writes.
Experts advise parents not to be afraid of their own feelings. Crying is okay - children can even learn from it that they too can let their feelings run free.
It's also good to explain your own emotional state and help prevent children from thinking that any irritability and sadness has something to do with them.
However, despite all the feelings and the desire to make the child feel good, experts advise against promising anything you can't deliver. This includes, for example, sentences like "Mum will soon be completely healthy again."
Children will feel insecure and betrayed if things turn out differently. If necessary, specialists from counselling centres and psycho-oncological services in hospitals can support parents in these discussions.
