Six Surprising Things You Learn Driving a Cop Car

Growing up loving cop cars like those from TJ Hooker, for the past couple years I’ve fantasized buying a law enforcement Dodge Charger—in particular, a supervisor’s Dodge Charger, complete with push bumpers and A-pillar mounted spotlights, but with regular seats as opposed to the blood- and bile-proof plastic benches. Being too lazy to attend a car auction filled with decrepit Pontiac G6s, or getting ripped off on eBay, I never took the plunge, but Dodge sent me something even better to try out for a week: a 2015 Dodge Charger Pursuit.

When I first saw the email, I figured it’d be a black Charger with some upgraded internals, but I was shock how it exactly looked and acted the part, save for the dubiously phrased “Dodge Law Enforcement” decal on the side. It didn’t matter, because I passed for officer Vince Romano incarnate whenever I was on the road, even if I never flicked on the fully functional sirens in public. I’ve been gawked at in a Ferrari or Bentley, but nothing prepared me for this.

You learn a lot driving a cop car and how people react (or don’t), and here are six surprise takeaways in driving the Charger Pursuit:

1. You need to read the laws with a fine-toothed comb when driving a (former) police Charger. My initial excitement turned into horror when I thought to myself, “what happens when I get pulled over in this thing”? After all, it’s a felony to impersonate an officer. Dodge/Chrysler PR assured me it’d be OK provided I didn’t use any of the buttons or the loudspeaker, and the manufacturer plates gave some credence to my driving the car. I even pulled up to the local Sunnyvale police station to get some impressions from local law enforcement, but only an admin was available, who gave the thumbs up. Of the half-dozen law enforcement vehicles I passed by, none pulled me over.

But what constitutes impersonating law enforcement if I buy a police Charger myself? The answer isn’t clear-cut, and it boils down to your state laws. For example, California doesn’t allow extra flashing lights on your car (like a light bar), whether it’s amber or clear (California Vehicle Code 25250). You could have clear LEDs in the grill provided they don’t flash, though some cops may try to cite you with CVC 24003 as a catch-all (which technically pertain to interior lights). Either way, you can guarantee that some miffed law enforcement will eventually pull you over your Crown Victoria or Charger looks the part, even if you’re within code.

2. A new midsize sedan can probably outmaneuver it. They may say you can’t outrun the radio, but your mom’s champagne-hued Accord will give a single squad car trouble on tight, twisty roads. The ballistic door panels ($4,600 for both) and a giant light bar on top (part of the $2,000 police prep package) don’t help the Charger in the weight department, and it’s a handful at the limit in the RWD version. From the moment you turn in you get unrelenting understeer, as though engineers tuned the suspension assuming you’d have two 500-pound perps in the rear seats. Yet even dab the throttle on corner exit and it jerks into oversteer like an old tail-sliding Dodge Monaco from The Blues Brothers. It’s good fun that the stability control waits for a little slide before kicking in, but not the most efficient way to get around. That said…

3. It demolishes most cars on straightaways. Aside from its menacing styling, my favorite part of the car is the engine. While a pig in tight turns, in true ‘Murica spirit the 5.7 Hemi V-8 will catch up to all but the fastest perps on the interstate. Dodge officially says it does a 0-60 time of “under six seconds,” and in reality it’s more in the mid- to low 5s. The throttle response is crisp even with the slushy five-speed automatic, and the brakes confidently bite thanks to the police ABS heavy-duty system.

4. It makes for a serene driving experience. Nobody ever tailgates you, cuts you off, or flips the bird. Not only that, but people magically become respectful toward others. I saw two cars playing the dangerous game of tailgating and brake-checking chicken on the left lane, and the minute they spotted my car they started acting like they were driving Miss Daisy.

Granted, I may have luckily avoided some crazy driver with a death wish against police, but for one week, I experienced a surreal world devoid of road rage, full of order and sanity. I can’t even get that in five minutes of San Francisco traffic, and I strangely started embracing their presence on the road more.

5. People never look to the right lanes for cop cars. When driving in the middle or left lane, whatever speed I was driving at was the speed limit for others—at least, until some saw the “not in service” magnetic sign and sped off.  Most still treated the Charger as a real cop car though, and wouldn’t dare passing. But when cruising in the right lane of the 101, I’d consistently see motorists zooming down the fast lane with uninhibited aplomb. So if you’re going to speed, check the slow lanes. At night I became practically invisible until they saw the distinguishing features up close. They should’ve checked out a handy light-pattern guide, though it’s missing the latest Charger.

6. Uneasy cars stand out. By default, everybody tenses up when realizing a police car is sharing the road with them. But some became outright erratic, steering clear of me as though I was a deranged ex-boyfriend with a restraining order. One poor Toyota Hilux driver likely thought I was tailing him because I coincidentally changed multiple lanes with him to get off the freeway, and kept swerving, wafting and switching more lanes. “I might run his plates if I were a cop,” I thought to myself. Dale Carlson, a former police officer who set the record for felony arrests in Florida, said it well in his book Arrest-Proof Yourself. One of his four golden rules is “if police can’t see you, they can’t arrest you.”

“Police are visual predators,“ Carson says. "Any sudden change in motion, speed, direction or behavior immediately attracts their attention.”

So whether you’re with expired plates or have a body stashed in your trunk, drive as though you’ve never even got a parking ticket in your life.

Driving the Charger Pursuit has been an eye-opening experience. Interestingly, the police version is the only one available now with a 5.7-liter Hemi and AWD, making it a Mopar novelty. Maybe it’s time to scour those weekend auctions after all.