The Mercedes-AMG EQE SUV Still Isn't Fast Enough To Outrun Its Polarizing Styling

Photo: Mercedes
Photo: Mercedes

Atlanta doesn’t exactly have the most impressive press fleet; while most of my colleagues regularly get press cars, my loans tend to be a bit more spotty. I knew that when I moved here, but thankfully, Mercedes really wanted me to experience the new charging hub that it recently opened next to its North American headquarters, so it offered the only car in the Atlanta press fleet for me to check it outan AMG EQE SUV.

Ideally, I would have taken it up to my old stomping grounds in the North Georgia mountains for a more serious test of the AMG part of the crossover’s ridiculously long name. Unfortunately, I’m also completely unfamiliar with the charging infrastructure up there, and the last thing I want is to run out of juice surrounded by Marjorie Taylor Green acolytes in a socialist car.

The headline figures are the EQE’s 617 horsepower and 0-60 time of 3.4 seconds, but the more important one is its torque: 701 pound-feet. It’s not enough to do four-wheel burnouts, but when that thing goes, it goes. The acceleration would be almost physically unpleasant if it wasn’t so addictive — and almost a little terrifying. Later acceleration runs felt less tame, so either I found the exact right speed to be driving for maximum Gs, or my body adjusted.

Photo: Mercedes
Photo: Mercedes

If you’ve got the $110,000 before options and want an incredibly powerful luxury cruiser, you’ll probably be very happy with the AMG version of the EQE SUV. At least, you will be if your cruises are relatively short; 235 miles of range isn’t a lot, and in a car that encourages you to floor it just for fun, good luck getting anywhere close to that range figure.

I’m very much not the target demographic for a six-figure electric luxury SUV, but as a daily driver and (albeit short) highway cruiser, it did its best to charm its way to my heart with its incredibly comfortable and supportive seats, one-pedal-ish driving and its ridiculous amount of torque. Man, I love torque.

And while its non-AMG counterparts are probably much more comfortable on Atlanta’s poorly maintained streets, with the suspension set in Comfort mode, I didn’t have any complaints. The biggest downside to the car that I noticed was just that it took much longer than expected to get the seat adjusted just right. Well, that and the range. And the styling.

Photo: Mercedes
Photo: Mercedes

Honestly, since I can charge at my apartment, the range isn’t really that big of a deal to me. If I needed to visit my aunt in Charlotte, I could just stop along the way and charge while I ate lunch. Anything further away than Charlotte, and I’m probably flying. I don’t know if I’d want something with less than 150 miles of range, but practically speaking, I probably don’t even need that. I know most people won’t buy an EV with a range of less than 300 miles, but personally, it’s not that big of a deal to me.

The real sticking point is the styling. Every time I’d get out of the EQE, I’d look back, hoping that with enough time behind the wheel, the design would suddenly click for me. I wanted to change my mind on it, and I get that aerodynamics are important in an EV, but it just didn’t happen. Which is fine. The styling isn’t for me, and I like cars that other people don’t. It just doesn’t feel great to enjoy driving so much and still be put off by the styling.

Photo: Mercedes
Photo: Mercedes

And that’s really the whole thing with Mercedes’ EQ lineup. I know there are people who legitimately dig the styling and plenty who don’t. In general, I like it when automakers release polarizing designs instead of trying to cater to everyone. I just happen to fall on the wrong side of that divide, and no matter how enjoyable the car was to drive, I just couldn’t get past the looks enough to want the EQE SUV even if I can’t afford it. Trust me, though. I wanted to want the EQE.

If you’re one of the people who are into the EQE’s design and have enough money to lease one — odds are, depreciation is going to hit these so hard, you should definitely lease, not buy — once you figure out your seating position, a quick test drive is all it will take to convince you to go for it. Unless you legitimately believe you need more range, that is. Even if you currently think you need more range, 701 lb-ft of torque does a great job of convincing you that you actually don’t, even as it burns through your battery like Sherman marching through Atlanta.

If you fall on the other side of the line and don’t like how it looks, the bad news for you is that there’s a solid performance EV under there that you’ll never get to experience. In a perfect world, everything would be made with your likes and dislikes in mind, but the reality is that sometimes something just isn’t for you, and that’s OK. I hope the people who like the look enjoy their AMG EQE SUV and its 701 lb-ft of torque. I’ll be over here quietly jealous.

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