Moving In Together? How To Guarantee Harmony


The experts dish their top advice for maintaining cohabitation bliss. (Photo: Offset/Westend61)

More so than with any other kind of roommate, moving in with a significant other is full of excitement and new beginnings.

But it can also be full of challenges — maybe you’re an introvert who craves alone time and she’s an extrovert who can’t get enough togetherness, or maybe you’re a neat freak while he’s a little more “lenient” with the organization skills. How can you keep the peace when you’re sharing living quarters?

We turned to the experts to find out how to maintain harmony in the home:

1. Make time for one another.

“Bliss, or a high degree of contentment, can be maintained when partners carve time out of their schedules to be together without distractions, and instead focus on each other,” Susan K. Whitbourne, PhD, professor of psychology at University of Massachusetts Amherst, tells Yahoo Health.

2. Provide positive reinforcement.

We can help our partners with this learning process by positively reinforcing them when they do something that we like or makes us happy.

“In other words, we should say, ‘I love it when you bring me flowers,’ if we want to keep getting flowers!” Charlotte N. Markey, PhD, professor of psychology at Rutgers University, tells Yahoo Health.

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3. Reminisce about the early days.

Dedicate a “Throwback Thursday” Instagram post to your sweetie — bringing up memories from first dates, first laughs, and first touches can help reinforce commitment, says Whitbourne.

4. Have open communication.

“Do you like the couch there or here?” “Should we get a dog?” “You fold your laundry like that?” Living with a partner can open the door to new habits and quirks that went unnoticed when living separately. Don’t stress, Markey says. Just keep the line of communication open.

“The best decisions will emerge out of honest and direct communication with a partner,” she says. “Honest communication can facilitate intimacy and understanding.”

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