'Archie' Gets a 'Subversive' TV Makeover
Looks like it’s time to get serious about Archie. The long-running comic book chronicling the misadventures of the carrot-topped teen and his Riverdale pals — Betty, Veronica, Jughead, and Reggie, among them — has received a ground-up reboot in the form of the just-released Archie #1. Penned by superstar comic book writer, Mark Waid, the new series brings the character fully into the modern day in terms of fashion sense, music tastes, and even artwork. Archie’s publisher, Archie Comics, will be using the upcoming San Diego Comic-Con weekend to introduce their flagship character’s new attitude with an Archie Forever panel on Friday, July 10 (1 p.m. in Room 4).
One of the items on Archie’s docket is a live-action TV show, tentatively titled Riverdale and overseen by uber-producer, Greg Berlanti, the mind behind such hit comic book series as Arrow and The Flash, along with this fall’s Supergirl. It’s the first live-action series in Archie history, which is more than a little amazing when you consider that the character has been around for 74 years. And it’s not like television hasn’t tried to bring the citizens of Riverdale to life on the small screen before; various cartoon shows came and went over the decades and there were also several live action incarnations that never lasted beyond a single airing.
According to the press release, the new Riverdale, which is still early in the development process, will present a “a bold, subversive take on Archie, Betty, Veronica, and their friends, exploring the surrealistic twists of small-town life plus the darkness and weirdness bubbling beneath Riverdale’s wholesome facade.” (Translation: It’s Twin Peaks meets The O.C.!) That approach squares with some of the bolder experiments the publisher has been trying in recent years, most notably the popular Afterlife With Archie comic series that takes place post-zombie apocalypse. But will a “bold, subversive” Archie be the Archie that the viewing public wants to see? Here, we look back at the character’s TV past to best determine how to proceed with his TV future.
Archie (1964)
What Worked: The Ferris Bueller-like shenanigans that Archie (John Simpson) pulls to convince his parents that he’s up and walking around when he’s actually asleep in bed are impressive in their ingenuity if not their results. Also, Roland Winters’s Mr. Weatherbee is appropriately weather-beaten by the thought of putting up with young Mr. Andrews.
What Didn’t Work: This Jughead seems desperately in need of brain food, if you catch our drift. Also, Archie’s “It’s not me, it’s them!” attitude towards Betty and Veronica’s competitive advances doesn’t win him any sympathy from us.
Lessons for Riverdale: At least a casual resemblance to the characters sketched on the page would be nice. (How can you even call yourself Archie when your Archie is blond?) Also, try to cast actors who somewhat resemble high school (rather than college) seniors.
The Archie Show (1968)
What Worked: The theme song is so ‘60s, you could eat it with a lovin’ spoonful. The rest of the music — including “Sugar, Sugar” which became an honest-to-God chart-topping hit in 1969 — is pretty great, too.
What Didn’t Work: The voiceover actors all sound like they’re sucking down helium between takes.
Lessons for Riverdale: Take a page from Glee and Empire and make music a regular part of the show, with The Archies writing and performing original tunes, which can be released after each episode with a full album to follow at the end of the season. Given the tenor of the times, though, the band should probably sing in the key of Grizzly Bear rather than The Monkees.
Archie (1976, 1978)
What Worked: Nobody really knows, because all traces of this one-off live-action ABC special appear to have been erased from the record books. An extremely scratchy recording of a 1978 sequel broadcast can be found, however, and it’s almost as cheestastic as the infamous Star Wars Holiday Special.
What Didn’t Work: David Caruso, apparently. The future CSI: Miami star was originally tapped to play Archie in the 1976 special, but was quickly replaced by Dennis Bowen. (Not quickly enough for the publicity team to correct the special’s credits; this TV Guide listing still credits Caruso as Archie even though Bowen is featured in the ad.) Meanwhile, the variety show structure and fourth-wall breaking antics of the ’78 version are just plain awkward.
Lessons for Riverdale: Don’t get too cute with the structure: Let Archie talk directly to the audience if he must (Waid does the same thing in Archie #1 for what it’s worth), but everyone else should only speak to each other.
The New Archies (1987)
What Worked: In the very first episode, an alien lands in Riverdale, shows off some serious basketball skills, and falls for Betty. That sounds plenty “bold” and “subversive” to us!
What Didn’t Work: The ‘80s flourishes — like café owner Pops folding a video store into his business and Archie calling everyone “dude” — date the series more severely than any issue of the original comic. Also, we frown on the decision to take the characters back to junior high: After all, Archie’s supposed to be the quintessential teen, not the quintessential tween.
Lessons for Riverdale: Sci-fi elements are encouraged, but maybe avoid the blatant E.T. rip-offs. And junior high love triangles are much less compelling than their high school equivalents, so keep the action restricted to grades 9-12.
Archie: To Riverdale and Back (1990)
What Worked: Admit it: It was kind of fun to see what Archie and the gang looked like all grown up in this TV movie.
What Didn’t Work: But boy… what a bunch of losers they all turned out to be! Veronica’s been through four husbands, Betty’s attracted to bad boys, Jughead’s a single dad (who raps “Sugar, Sugar” with his kid to boot), and Archie’s a stuffed suit. This is why they tell kids to never grow up.
Lessons for Riverdale: Leave the characters’ future up to our imagination and focus on the present. Also, never ever turn “Sugar, Sugar” into a rap.
Archie’s Weird Mysteries (1999)
What Worked: In general, the animated versions of Archie were more willing to be less tethered to reality than the live-action shows. That’s especially true here, where each episode forces the gang to confront such unnatural phenomenons as alternate realities and 50-foot Veronicas.
What Didn’t Work: Actually, this series was pretty fun! Probably not feasible budget-wise for a live action adaptation, but the horror/sci-fi elements presage out-there comics like Afterlife with Archie. (Funnily enough, there’s actually a zombie-themed episode.)
Lessons for Riverdale: If you’ve got an appealing take on the characters, it’s OK to get “weird” or, as you put it, “subversive.”
Archie #1 is available for purchase now. Comic-Con runs July 9-12 in San Diego.
