Lady Gaga Wore Nipple Pasties to Meet Prince Harry
Much has been said of Lady Gaga’s recent ladylike makeover. From the heart-shaped diamond on her finger to the sophisticated old-Hollywood dresses and Veronica Lake-like waves, the headline making ensembles have mostly disappeared. Or had. On Monday, within a span of 24 hours, the singer showed off both her new predilections and her old self.
Each look’s rated on a scale of 1 to 10 Lady Gagas: One being the new Mother Monster who sometimes goes by Stefani Joanne Angelina Germanotta, wears a lilac bridesmaid dress, and dons Lacoste sweatsuits and pearls; Ten Lady Gagas equals OG Gaga, think Alexander McQueen armadillo heels, latex eggs, and Kermit the Frog plush toys.
Photo: Getty Images
The newly-engaged star started her day off simply enough. Wearing a white silk jumpsuit that any (and every) basic bitch has in her closet this season. She added some flair with cerulean suede heels, a long white sweater, white cat-eye sunglasses, and a chain link newsboy cap.
Lady Gaga Count: 2
She avoids blending in with every other female pedestrian by wearing a hat that only she (and Madonna) would own.
Photo: Getty Images
Lady Gaga went to Paris Fashion Week and found couture. Not the one-of-a-kind crazy couture that only she can wear, but the covetable kind that makes fashionistas drool. Alexander Wang took the 29-year-old under his wing, dressing her for the Balenciaga show in boring separates, and then the Met Ball. For her second outfit change of the day, she took a style everyone’s wearing — midi skirt and crop top — but infused some Gaga with exaggerated semi-sleeves, oversized superfluous buttons, and multi-colored Pierre Hardy sandals.
Lady Gaga Count: 5
No one else shopping Moda Operandi could pull this off. Also, she’s leaving a Bikram Yoga class, so extra Lady Gagas for inappropriate dressing for this setting.
Photo: Getty Images
In London to perform with Tony Bennett at a WellChild charity concert, the “Born This Way” artist was classy-meets-kooky in a chainmail-like gown that showed ample cleavage. Her hair was pulled back into a chic chignon, with delicate earrings on her lobes. Her attempt to look semi-normal failed as soon as she added crystal eyebrows.
Lady Gaga Count: 7.5
She just had to go and Lady Gaga the perfectly normal outfit. One point for each Swarovski-ed eyebrow and half a point for taking things one step too far.
Photo: AP Images
Never forget that before Beyoncé, Kim Kardashian, and Jennifer Lopez made the sheer trend the thing, Lady Gaga was a lone soldier sashaying around the world in next-to-nothing. Lest this legacy be buried, she reminded everyone that nobody does near-naked better than she, wearing a white figure skater-like gown with a feathered skirt and matching scarf. Only sequin pasties hid her nipples from Prince Harry. Sure, he’s been to Las Vegas before, but he’s still royalty.
Lady Gaga Count: 9
All she’s missing is a colored wig or wild hat.
Photo: Getty Images
She’s baaaaaaacckkkkk. Heading to da club, Gaga wore a hardware store DIY project over grannie panties (so trendy) and silver sequin nipple pasties. The outfit’s truly brought to old Lady Gaga level with a large fascinator made from a few crows and massive platforms.
Lady Gaga Count: 10
An ensemble’s only truly deserving of 10 Lady Gagas if it meets these criteria: One, show excessive amounts of skin; two, wear multiple items that’d be considered unwearable by a majority of the population; and three, have something on your head that impedes vision and/or balance. Check, check, and check.
