Dolce, Vuitton & the Other Brands We’d Love to Jump on the Filter Bandwagon

Is there an app for the Dolce live? Photo: Dolce & Gabbana

So much for #NoFilter.

First, Christian Louboutin announces an app that tints your photos with their signature scarlet hue. Yesterday, Everlane announced a similar plan, with filters like “minimal” and “modern” created to enhance your (and their) street style shots.

But which fashion brand is next? We’ve got a few ideas…

LOUIS VUITTON
Dear Nicolas Ghesquiere, Vuitton has made custom skateboards, soccer balls, and even skis. So can you please make an app that covers our selfies in your signature monogram logos? No really. Please.

DOLCE & GABBANA
This app can Photoshop a baby (birthed by a supermodel and unnervingly calm, of course) onto your hip. Who needs a Mansur Gavriel bag when you’ve got a 10-month-old in Italian silk?

ALEXANDER WANG
For luxury ravers worldwide, this filter makes all of your iPhone photos glow in the dark, and comes with instructions on how to throw a secret dance party. (Batteries and Miley not included.)

FENDI
Bad hair day? No problem. The Fendi App will replace your entire head with a Karlito puffball!  The famous Fendi monster poufs are also available, as an additional download.

BALMAIN
Although very expensive, this app makes your investment worthwhile: merely flashing it on your phone gives you ten seconds of FaceTime with Kim, Kanye, Kendall, or Kylie.

FREE PEOPLE
This app keeps your photos the same, but automatically changes your background to look like Coachella.