Leave Jeans Alone
I need someone to explain something to me. It is very confusing and I don't understand it. What is happening to jeans? Is there a conspiracy against jeans? As Racked pointed out, many sins have been committed against jeans in recent times. Wherefore? Whyfore? They are just a humble working pant!
You're a fashion-minded person. You've known for a while that all is not right in the world of denim. But if you think you knew just how not-right it has become, you are wrong. So, so wrong.
The stepped-hem jean
Where were you when you first saw the stepped-hem jean? At home? At work? Serenely browsing the shelves? For some reason, the innocent front hems of jeans suddenly found themselves unwanted, unloved, and discarded. Why? What did they ever do to you, apart from protect the front of your leg where the shin bone's connected to the ankle bone? (Or whatever, I'm not a doctor.)
The hip window jean
Then there was the hip window jean, otherwise known as the pocket cut-out jean, especially designed for people who are worried that their hip might suddenly disappear without warning. Keep an eye on that old hip! You never know when it will leave your body for magical and entirely unknown reasons.
The knee window jean WTF
Then-then!-the KNEE WINDOW JEAN. Yes, I agree that knees are beautiful and wondrous. But I do not understand why we had to give them a steamy plastic cage. I am very upset. Why aren't you upset?
Also, leave moms out of this!
What is this
For...pooping?
Help me please
A little cradle for belly buttons. Taylor Swift saged her house after she heard about these.
For the love of god
WHY...ONLY...ONE...LEG
(The answer is Coachella)
Why
It's...coming from inside the jean.
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