Her spouse has dementia like Bruce Willis. Here's her story – along with others.

David Oliver, USA TODAY
·4 min read

Rhonda Pearce, 63, is struggling with grief.

"My spouse has FTD (frontotemporal dementia). He was diagnosed right before Bruce Willis. It is a terrible disease which has slowly stripped us of our savings and stripped our family of our loving husband and father who could always make anyone laugh," she shared.

She doesn't want others to experience the pain she has: "We must have more research done," but grief is all around us.

Grief affects people each day – but not in ways we always consider. People die, yes, but so do pets. We can grieve dreams, jobs, our health, past versions of ourselves. Grief is not linear; it does not come in stages, a common misconception. It's unique to the individual.

After embarking on a series to document different grief journeys, we asked for your input. What kinds of grief had you experienced? Would you be willing to share your story publicly?

With nearly 500 responses and counting, here's a look at what some of you shared. You can submit your own story here.

"My spouse has FTD. He was diagnosed right before Bruce Willis (pictured)."
"My spouse has FTD. He was diagnosed right before Bruce Willis (pictured)."

Kimberly Jane ('KJ') Nasrul, 45

"This year has been a number of losses including a miscarriage, an empty search for my bio ancestors (I’m adopted), betrayal of a friend and mentor, the discovery of a blood clot in my brain which led to a major stroke and a seizure disorder that nearly killed me over the Thanksgiving and Christmas. Loss of language, loss of identity, loss of income for my wellness retreat business and private practice; loss of motor skills and independence and loss of ability to drive.

"While I was hospitalized after my stroke, I received my DNA ancestry results & health reports from 23andMe, learning my cultural & ethnic roots for the first time in my entire life. I’m learning and researching how to incorporate my indigenous roots of healing knowledge in the healing of modern wounds (stroke, diabetes, cognitive rehabilitation, grief, war)."

"I’m learning and researching how to incorporate my indigenous roots of healing knowledge in the healing of modern wounds (stroke, diabetes, cognitive rehabilitation, grief, war)," says Kimberly Jane (“KJ”) Nasrul, pictured.
"I’m learning and researching how to incorporate my indigenous roots of healing knowledge in the healing of modern wounds (stroke, diabetes, cognitive rehabilitation, grief, war)," says Kimberly Jane (“KJ”) Nasrul, pictured.

Tricia Remson, 57

"I lost my beloved 11-year-old lab almost two years ago, and the grief I experienced was so much worse than that which I experienced when I lost my father, who I loved dearly. I finally feel like myself again, but my life went dark for a full year following my sweet girl's death. I still think about her daily, and cannot bear the thought of scattering her ashes. They remain in a beautiful box displayed in my den, near a drawing of her that my daughter had made for me. It was truly a soul crushing time. My husband and daughters (one grown and one college-aged) were very understanding, which was such a blessing.

"I went so far as to write a short novella, where my Lexie is the co-main character and heroine!" says Tricia Remson, pictured here with Lexie. "I believe that the process of writing about her was cathartic enough to push me through to the other side."
"I went so far as to write a short novella, where my Lexie is the co-main character and heroine!" says Tricia Remson, pictured here with Lexie. "I believe that the process of writing about her was cathartic enough to push me through to the other side."

"I went so far as to write a short novella, where my Lexie is the co-main character and heroine! I believe that the process of writing about her was cathartic enough to push me through to the other side."

Margaret Bushell, 53

"I’m experiencing several types of grief - my little sister passed away unexpectedly (two weeks before Christmas) from cirrhosis. We were very close and we were best friends. Last year one of my lifelong best friends had a heart attack at 54 and passed. The last time I saw him was with my little sister two years ago, on the day that her new husband passed from cancer. I lost my first husband when I was 22 from a car accident 10 days before Christmas, and my estranged father was dying in a nursing home at Christmas. So the holidays have become all about death and grieving and have not been happy at all for 20 years now. My mother passed two days after Thanksgiving 20 years ago, and I’m still grieving her. She was the one who knew me best, loved me unconditionally and was my biggest cheerleader. Losing her was the single worst thing I’ve ever experienced.

"My family completely disintegrated then and I never felt more lost and alone. I ended up married to the first man I met in a new town I moved to, out of fear of being alone. I didn’t want to scare people off as I was trying to make friends, so I kept my mother's passing to myself and hid my grief... I grieve over the loss of being loved, affection and self-esteem.

"My family completely disintegrated then and I never felt more lost and alone," says Margaret Bushell, pictured.
"My family completely disintegrated then and I never felt more lost and alone," says Margaret Bushell, pictured.

"I am also grieving from leaving a lucrative job I had for 19 years due to workplace bullying... but fortunately an opportunity to open a new business came and I jumped on it. My new business is doing very well and I love my coworkers, but I grieve over how horribly I was treated.

"And in the past two years I have lost my mobility due to severe osteoarthritis in my hip and knees and I am not accepting the aging process very well. I feel like I’ve lost so much that I don’t know how to process these losses and move on."

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This article originally appeared on USA TODAY: Grief stories: Her spouse has dementia like Bruce Willis