Yes, I Will Accept the Golden Bachelor's Rose

Prepare to fall in love, America.

As an avid consumer of reality television, I can confidently say that Hannah Brown’s season of The Bachelorette may have been the last time we were truly united as a nation (Bachelor or otherwise). We laughed together, we cried together, we parked ourselves in front of our televisions to witness that podium moment together, and yet? In the seasons that followed, it was difficult for the franchise to maintain the spark that fans had come to know and expect from the dating show.

Enter: Gerry Turner, a 72-year-old widower (and The Bachelor franchise’s most refreshing lead in years) who boasts a solid midwestern heart, a will to find love, and, now, an Instagram full of thirsty DMs.

“It's been effing hilarious,” Turner tells InStyle when asked about the online thirst aimed at him since his Golden Bachelor reveal. “I have a file of love letters from women that I've never met before, from all over the country and one or two outside the country. The general theme is, ‘Hey, if you don't want to go through all that turmoil of the TV show, here's my name, my number, and let's just cut this process short.’”

Needless to say, Turner didn’t cut the process short. And unless you’ve been living under a rock the past few months, it’s likely that you’ve already heard at least something about the “golden-aged” man who’s taking the reins from the perfectly coiffed, square-jawed Bachelor leads who came before him.

But long before Turner spent his days dating 22 women (all over the age of 60, mind you), staring wistfully off of balconies, and perfecting his rose ceremony speeches, the former restaurateur was just a dad, standing in the doorway of his daughters’ Bachelor watch parties, pretending like he didn’t care about what was going on — and throwing in some eye rolls for good measure.

“That’s exactly what I would do. I would roll my eyes,” the Iowa native and current Indiana resident says when asked what his opinions were on the Bachelor franchise before being cast. “About episode 3 or 4, I'd say, ‘Oh, that's where the source of the drama is coming from two weeks from now.’ Sure enough, it would happen that way, and sometimes it looked like that drama was trumped up or contrived a little bit. That was off-putting.”

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Even so, those doorway lingers left him with enough knowledge of the show’s premise to realize what he’d gotten himself into upon being nominated for the “senior citizen” version back in 2020, kicking off what would soon become a three-year casting process all leading up to today: the day that Turner introduces himself to the world as the first-ever Golden Bachelor.

Not only did I have the pleasure of talking with Turner just days ahead of the show’s Sept. 28 premiere, but I was able to embark on somewhat of a mini one-on-one with the budding star before the rest of America decides to steal him for a sec.

As we chat, Turner tells me about his dating red flags: “Women who have any kind of an obsession” (Disney adults are exempt). His celebrity crush: “Sandra Bullock” (Taste!). The top traits he looks for in a woman: “A sense of humor and the ability to laugh at themselves” (I blush. Surely he’s talking about me, right? — He’s not). And even if he’d ever consider getting into the influencer game once his season wraps up.

“If you remember my appearance on Good Morning America, when I didn't even know what a grand-zaddy was, I'm probably not a good candidate for being an influencer,” Turner laughs.

“I can't speak for all of the women that were on the show. Perhaps some of them have that aspiration, but I doubt it,” he adds. “I think at our age, we're much more interested in finding the right partner, the person we want to spend the rest of our lives with, rather than developing a group of followers on Instagram. Our priorities are different.”

A group of Bachelor cast members actually there for the right reasons? It’s about damn time.

Read on as InStyle chats with Turner about his Bachelor journey, the quickest way into his heart (hnt: he’s a words of affirmation guy), and the love advice he would give his 25-year-old self.

Congrats on becoming the first Golden Bachelor! Tell me a little bit about the casting process.

The process started over three years ago. My daughters wanted me to answer the ad that was on The Bachelor, asking for the senior Bachelor contestants. And I answered it back then, got a call, and went through one Zoom meeting. Then, of course, it went silent because of COVID. So in February of this year, I got a call back, asking if I was still interested. At first, I said, "No, I'm not. I now have a really good trusted circle of friends, and I feel like I'm whole, I'm complete now. I don't need it."

And the producers were very persuasive, pointing out that there was travel involved and excitement and the possibility of finding my last true love and so forth. So, I did give in, and then of course, it was a series of background checks and STD tests. Pretty hilarious. I think there was a financial background check, a psychological check, and just one thing after another. Which, in retrospect, I really appreciate that, because I know that the women are going through the same vetting process.

What was it like being on camera?

It was never bothersome to me. I can't remember a time, except for the very last moments of the show, when I was nervous. I would feel energized and I would feel focused and positive about what was going on, but I wasn't nervous. And I think what really helped me was the promotional time that I was out here, well before the show started, and the photographers and the experience then was a good lead-up, giving me the basics and fundamentals of what I was going to need when the show started taping.

Were there ever moments during filming where you found yourself thinking, "Oh, this is going to be something that I would've rolled my eyes at?"

Certainly, I understand there's a blend of my personal journey to find someone, and that blended with the need to create an interesting and compelling TV show. I know that there's going to be some things that will bring people back and will make people question what's going on. That's just part of it.

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What did you find the most challenging about being the Bachelor?

Learning how to compartmentalize the dates and the women, and learn as much as I could about them in the brief periods of time that I would have. Cumulatively, I had quite a bit of time with everyone, but it would come in short stints. And so having to remember those details and put them in my little box and put a lid on that box and set it aside for the next woman and open up her box, that was a very difficult process. I think I tend to be a linear thinker, A to B to C, and I had to not be that way in learning how to get to know the women.

In what ways do you think being later in your life and having a better sense of self helped you figure out which women you did and didn’t mesh with?

It was that process in a nutshell that helped me through the very first rose ceremony. Because by then, I had only been able to spend 10 minutes with each of the women. At that point, it wasn't the side of the coin where, "Who's the right person for me?" It was more, "Who's not the right person?" And I have said it a million times, every one of those women was poised and elegant and beautiful, but it was clear that very first night that several of them simply wouldn't be the right person for me. And that helped me in that first rose ceremony.

What are your red flags when it comes to dating?

Women who have any kind of an obsession, whether it's smoking, drinking, gambling, shopping. Any of those things.

What are the top three traits that you look for in a partner?

I think the top three would be a sense of humor and the ability to laugh at themselves, the ability to be an equal partner, and a sense of connection or empathy with me. An understanding of each other.

What’s the most romantic gesture someone can do in a relationship?

I think that might speak to someone's love language. It might be different for different people. But I think I react well when my partner compliments my appearance because I dress to please my partner. And when they recognize that, I think that's a very romantic gesture.

That being said, what’s one outfit you wore during filming that made you think, "Damn, I look good?”

Dark blue jeans, a white V-neck T-shirt, and a light blue jacket. It was actually a suit jacket, but I wore it as a sports jacket. It was less structured. I thought I looked good, but I felt comfortable in it. And actually several of the women commented that even though I looked great in the suits, they loved that look. So, that reaffirmed how I felt about it.

Would you say that you have a type?

That's a really good question. I thought I had a type, and it turns out not so much. I think if anything, my type is more tied to personality traits than physical appearance. I'm so attracted to a sense of humor and a good conversationalist that if that qualifies as a type, then that might be it.

Who’s your celebrity crush?

I would say my celebrity crush is Sandra Bullock. I love her versatility in acting. I love her personality, but I think she has values and morals that are very much in line with what I would like to be and to see in a partner and so forth.

What advice, if any, would you give to your 25-year-old self if you could?

Ooh, when I was 25 years old, I wouldn't listen to anybody. I was so busy trying to be the alpha male wherever I was at. I was a horrible listener back then. Maybe the best advice would be to slow down and learn how to be a good listener, learn how to drink it in, and learn how to live in the moment a little bit more. That might be the best advice I could have given me back then.

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