Woman With Vitiligo is Learning to Love her Skin

This woman has hid her body since she was 12 years old due to vitiligo, an autoimmune disease that causes areas of her skin to lose pigmentation. “When I first got vitiligo it was just this little spot on my neck and I was at the age where I was still trying to figure out who I was,’ Ashley Soto told the Daily Mail. “I got a lots of mean comments and people staring so it was really hard.”

Soto says that the worst comment she got was at a pool when she was 13 and a stranger said it looked like she had showered in bleach. “I was in my swimming costume and I knew people were staring but I tried to not let it get to me,” said Soto. “I just ran into the bathroom and cried. It made me afraid after that and I didn’t ever go swimming again.” Soto wore long sleeves despite the hot Florida weather. “I used to be a cheerleader and I was super outgoing. But after I got vitiligo I separated myself and I didn’t want to make friends because I was so scared of being judge and not accepted,” said Soto. “There were so many days when I would just stay at home, all day, because of it. I had no friends and I would never want to go anywhere or do things without my mom.” Vitiligo also effected Ashley’s love life, as she tried to hide herself and “felt that they would think it was gross.”

But Ashley grew tired of hiding, and four months ago she shared her first photo showcasing the vitiligo on her body. “Before my account was just about make-up and I would never show my body, just my face and selfies,” she said. “I was too scared to show my body; I learnt how to cover my face. But I had seen other girls putting themselves out there and I had read lots of positive comments. I was really afraid, I was preparing myself for nasty comments but it was really positive.” The response inspired Soto to stop feeling ashamed of her skin. “’I started slowly ‑ I stopped wearing sweaters and I would go to the corner stop without long sleeve to see how I feel,” said Soto. “It went little by little and I went to wearing tank tops which was something I would never do. And recently I went to theme park and I forced myself to wear a swimsuit. It was so weird at first but I just don’t want live to go back to what it was before. I realize that I may be different but I am unique and I should be proud of who I am. I have finally learnt to love myself. I am so much happy now I am able to do something or my own. Now I hope my Instagram page can help others too.”

Former model Breanne Rice shares a similar story. “At 19, I was diagnosed with vitiligo, and it spread rapidly causing me to lose over half of the pigment on my face. Yeah. Not the bottom of my foot or my arm..but ONLY on my face,” Rice wrote on Instagram. “I got really good at doing my makeup, and I didn’t want anyone to know about it. I couldn’t look in the mirror without crying, and feeling unattractive.” Rice admits that vitiligo still takes digs at her confidence, and like Ashley Soto, she worries that people she’s interested in will find her vitiligo unattractive. “You know what though, I own it. There’s not much I can do about it. I can only love myself, and not let my circumstances define my value or self-worth. What is the definition of beautiful anyway? Is it being perfect? What do you see when you look in the mirror? Perhaps you have a circumstance or something about yourself that you are insecure about. Don’t let it define you. You deserve love, and you are beautiful.”

Winnie Harlow, a Canadian model with vitiligo, is normalizing the condition and inspiring others to be confident in their skin. “People sometimes ask when I learned to love myself. But that was not the issue. I didn’t have a problem with myself or my skin,” she wrote on Instagram. “I had a problem with the way people treated me because of my skin. They tried to define me. I had to relearn how to love myself by forgetting the opinions of everyone else and focusing on my opinion of myself.”

Critics say that Harlow’s career is a success because of her vitiligo, and she is not here for it. “So many people comment everyday why I’m celebrated ‘just cause she has a skin condition’,” she wrote on Instagram. “My point has never been to celebrate vitiligo, or that I have it. But to celebrate the confidence that everyone can have by believing in themselves.”