Why an Etiquette Book Sold Out in 24 Hours
Whenever we have an etiquette question, we go straight to Myka Meier who can often be found at The Plaza Hotel, where she runs Beaumont Etiquette, hosting her famous “The Plaza Finishing Program” (among other classes), and consulting with people and businesses all over the world—royals included). Her first book, Modern Etiquette Made Easy, sold out within 24 hours, cementing what Meier has always believed: “etiquette is way more than just which fork and knife to pick to pick up.”
T&C sat down with Meier and talked about how etiquette, which has long been associated with cotillion and Emily Post, has finally become cool.
Etiquette is suddenly on trend– why do you think this is?
We are constantly connected to our devices and people have realized that we are losing the soft skills that you need to use in person. Etiquette is way more than just which fork and knife to pick up (though I do dedicate two chapters in the book to dining); it is all about social intelligence. Throughout my book I talk about how to make friends with just about anyone, good conversation starters depending on the personality-type you are speaking to, how to become the most coveted party guest, and how to command the room with your presence. I even share which eye to look into when you want to come across as more likeable!
I also think the younger generation of royals have showed you can be sophisticated, respectful, and kind and people want to emulate that. I added plenty of royal etiquette secrets in the book to show people how to sit, stand, get out of cars, carry a handbag, walk a staircase and take a photo like the royals do.
How did you become involved with etiquette?
I was living abroad in London and working as the only American at a British company. I realized that there was this sort of unspoken code of eating and socializing, from how to properly hold silverware to this undeniable polish, that everyone seemed to know except me! I took my first etiquette course and left gobsmacked at what I didn’t know and loved the confidence it gave me. I eventually started training under a former member of Queen Elizabeth II’s household staff. She used to teach Princess Diana and other royals, and I was fascinated that I could learn the same training. I started teaching my American expat friends in London over these fun cocktail parties and word started to spread.
We had to move the gatherings to some of the private members clubs, and I would play host to a dinner and then we’d dance the night away. We became known throughout town as the American “bunnies” because we would hop from Annabel’s to 5H and Arts and then make it back in time around the circle of Berkeley Square clubs to end up for one last twirl before the sun would rise. In my book I tell the story about the night I danced with Harry (we called them Harry & Wills back then). It was so clear to see that my social experiment of confidence through etiquette had worked, and that if I could learn it, anyone could.
The book is a guide teaching formal etiquette but with a dash of humor. I wanted it to feel as though it was still that close friend teaching another. I specifically wrote it in this way because I wanted etiquette to become relatable and accessible again.
What is one etiquette rule we can all apply to our lives right now?
Etiquette is all about kindness, respect, consideration, and putting others first. So the reason why we dress ourselves in a polished way is to show respect not only for ourselves, but to show that we put effort into our appearance because we were meeting the other person. We dine in a certain way to show others that we are eating politely in their presence. You might know all the forks on the table, but if you don’t go up and introduce yourself to someone standing alone in the corner of the room, you still may have a lot of etiquette to work on.
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