Wayne Gretzy's bedtime is 9 o'clock

(Working to live … or living to work)

It is hard to escape the discussion about work-life balance. It appears in job advertisements, newspaper and magazine articles, as well as seminars provided by human resource groups. As a parent, I have a personal story about what it means to work in order to live – and not the other way around.

I remember the first time I heard about Wayne Gretzky. He was featured as a 10-year-old on the cover of a magazine that came with our regular newspaper subscription. Even then he was setting records for scoring points, compiling ridiculous statistics as an amateur hockey player. I was 10 years old at the time.

My youngest son (now 10) is a great sports fan and Wayne is one of his heroes. However, as much as I hate to admit it, as a hockey player, my son is no Wayne Gretzky. He can skate well enough and provides a valuable contribution to his team, but at best he is only a normal athlete.

In our working lives we all want to succeed, and we measure our efforts in various ways: by our position in an organization; by how much we earn; by the number of employees who report to us. For many people, these are the yardsticks used to calibrate their happiness. But with time (and perhaps, a bit of wisdom) some of us realize that there are other more important measures of self-worth.

Our home lives, for instance.

Achieving that elusive work-life balance should not be a daunting task if we know our priorities. While we all must contribute to the smooth functioning of society, work is only part of that endeavor. Our families provide us with support and our children with a sense of future possibilities. Someday, they too will be working and raising a family and making their own contribution.

Gonzo journalist, Hunter Thompson, is credited with saying: "Half of life is just showing up." Well, I'm happy to say that I did show up... both at work and at my son's hockey games. I know that not everyone will be a star at the office or the arena but then, too, without most of us simply showing up, there would not be any stars. Even Wayne Gretzky would not have been who he is without a large supporting cast of other players and his irrepressible parents.

So, as I tuck my little sports star in at night (9 p.m. sharp), I marvel at how much I've learned from him –  about living and working – by just being a part of his life. With his eyes slowly closing, I imagine him dreaming about rushing up the ice, like his hero, and scoring the winning goal for his team. And then, eventually, once I hear his soft snoring begin, I whisper quietly, "Good night, Wayne... and don't forget that I'm your biggest fan."

Ron Messer holds six university degrees and teaches at Kwantlen Polytechnic University, located in Vancouver, British Columbia. He does not think of himself as a writer, but rather as an interpreter of ‘big ideas’ and how they apply to our personal lives. He can be reached at ron.messer@kpu.ca

This article originally appeared on Palm Springs Desert Sun: Wayne Gretzy's bedtime is 9 o'clock