Country star Walker Hayes on letting his 6 kids express themselves: 'If my kid wants purple hair, get it'

Welcome to So Mini Ways, Yahoo Life's parenting series on the joys and challenges of childrearing.

Being a successful musician on tour — like taking in the applause of an excited crowd and sharing your art with thousands of fans — isn't always as glamorous as it may seem. And that’s something country star Walker Hayes knows all too well. “I love my job, but I love it exponentially more because my family goes with me — the kids go, the dogs go, my wife goes,” he says. “It's a lot of travel. It's tiring. It's a lot of laundry. The food is never healthy.” The bright side? “Literally every day, we're making memories,” says Hayes. “I get to make memories for a living right now, and it's incredible. Every day is so different. We just love it.”

One of the most precious memories Hayes recently made with his kids was shooting a back-to-school campaign for Great Clips. Hayes and his six kids — Lela, 17, Chapel, 15, Baylor, 14, Beckett, 11, Loxley, 9, and Everly, 7 — star in a video for the North American chain, which uses the chorus from an unreleased song by Hayes, aptly named “Haircut.”

He quickly saw firsthand that the message of the campaign — that a fresh haircut can improve children’s confidence ahead of the first day of school — was reflected by his kids’ reactions to their new styles. “Just seeing my kids leave and get in the car and compare haircuts — Everly got hers chopped off, and she couldn't stop shaking it and just talking about it,” says Hayes. “And one of my quieter kids, Chapel, was proud of the cut he got. I was just reminded that it’s important, not only to kids, but to everyone just that they are expressing themselves in a way [in which] they're comfortable and confident.”

Hayes and his wife, Laney, support their kids’ self-expression by letting them experiment with their hair. “If my kid wants purple hair, get it,” he says. “If you want a mohawk, go for it. If you don't want a haircut, I will give you some tips. But I am not going to choose that battle. That is your God-given hair, do your thing. If it's gone wrong, hair is a great metaphor for life. It's gonna grow out. Your hair is not going to be that bad forever, and you can wear a hat.”

When dealing with any disappointment, Hayes urges his kids to find levity when possible. “If there's one thing [I’d love to see] my kids leave my house doing, it’s laughing at themselves,” he notes. “If you can do that, if you don’t take yourself too seriously, your life will be completely different. When you're a kid, some things matter a little too much, so I try to teach my kids with the bad moments like, ‘Hey, just laugh! It is a funny-looking haircut. But it'll be OK.’”

The dad of six is also committed to doing everything he can to connect with each child on their interests. “With my 7-year-old, I watched an episode of Austin & Ally with her every night on the road,” he explains. “With my son, who's 15, I play Rocket League, and I watch anime, and I couldn't [have been] less genuinely interested in either of those things. But I dove in, and now I'm addicted. It's that way with each kid. I find something that they are obsessed with, and I give it my all. That gives me and that child our thing, so there's always an easy conversation.”

Just as in any family, connection and harmony doesn’t always come naturally among the six Hayes kids. For instance, the “Fancy Like” singer shares that Loxley and Everly don’t get along all the time. “They're volatile,” he notes. “But I really try to preach, ‘No matter what, please step up for your brother or your sister. Please don't leave them hanging out there.’ My biggest rule is that [my kids] can fight with each other or say some things to each other, but [they have to] stand up for each other when we leave this house.”

Keeping the peace among the children is one of many aspects of raising six kids that’s a constant work in progress. Hayes acknowledges that he can “never juggle” all of their needs “perfectly.” “There's always going to be one plate that needs spinning that is almost falling,” he admits.

Accepting that mistakes and missteps are a part of parenthood is something Hayes admits he grapples with as a father. “No matter how much you love your kids, you're going to pass down baggage, and you're going to make mistakes daily,” he points out. “To me, that's the most frustrating thing. Every day, I can say, ‘I love you,’ but every day, there's something in my actions that say, ‘I love me more,’ and it makes me mad.”

Hayes continues, “They've seen many versions of their dad. They've seen poor dad, ‘I can provide for my family’ dad, they've seen alcoholic dad, they've seen sober dad, they've seen didn't know Jesus to know Jesus dad. You just love someone so much, but you can't be perfect for them. We all just need a whole lot of forgiveness.”

Ultimately, the country star believes that recognizing their dad’s humanity will benefit his brood. “I'm definitely not on some pedestal to my kids, and I think that’s helpful,” he says. “To say the least, being a dad and being a husband could quite possibly be the most humbling tasks I've ever encountered.”