This TikTok Nails It—The Most Wonderful Time of Year Is Also the Busiest for Parents

Truth be told, I complain about the holiday craziness but secretly thrive off it too!

Fact checked by Sarah Scott

I must admit. Since becoming a mom, I’ve developed a love/hate relationship with the month of December. To be clear, I’ve always loved the holiday season but my childhood memories feel much different than the ones I’m making with my own daughter.

We’re Jewish so celebrating Hanukkah is always interesting because it falls on a different “eight days” each year.  Sometimes it’s weeks before Christmas, sometimes it coincides with Christmas. That has not changed. However, when I was a kid, I looked forward to our eight crazy nights—which weren’t that crazy.

The first night was always a big present (i.e. Cabbage Patch Kid doll or Barbies) and the rest of the gifts were more “practical” (think calendars or pajamas). Yet, what I really cared about was the countdown to the last day of school before winter break. That was the BIG event of the season.

Maybe there was a classroom party which was just the PTA stopping by each classroom with pizza and candy canes. Then my family got on a plane to visit family in Philly where we had our traditional family brunch on Christmas day to exchange gifts with cousins and eat bagels and lox. Then we flew back home to start the new year without much fanfare. Easy peasy. The most stress I saw from my mom that time of year was trying to fit our gifts on the plane ride home.

So, I really related to Dave "FitDad" Ogleton's TikTok take on how this so-called “most wonderful time of year” is different for parents in the '90s versus now. Ogleton then lists the two things the kids had going on if it were back in the '90s. Things get real with he pretends to read an email from school listing all of the end-of-the-year celebrations: dress like a Grinch day, reindeer day, Polar Express conductor day, and candy cane hair day.

Then there's the holiday party tomorrow, Ogleton reads with emphasis, requiring 24 homemade, gluten-free, vegan, nutless cupcakes. "What in the Martha Stewart?!" Ogleton says. He ends the video by reading, "We'll email complicated details about that in an equally annoying separate email."

Bottom line: we parents are overbooked, overspending, and overextending ourselves at home, school, and in our communities to give our kids a magical end of the year/holiday season.

Now, if I’m being totally honest, as much as I agree with every word of FitDadCeo’s Tok Tok rant, I’ll admit that some of the stress and craziness is my own doing. I’m a rare breed that loves hosting. For some, it’s relaxing to wrap gifts or craft this time of year. But for me, planning a party is meditative. So offering to host a Hanukkah party after we just hosted 11 family members for Thanksgiving?! Bring it on!

Wait, tickets are on sale for The Nutcracker (who cares we have to drive 5 towns away in holiday traffic—it’s a new tradition I’ve been waiting to start with my daughter), a local production of The Christmas Carol, and Disney on Ice? Oh, and they all fall on the same weekend? No problem. I’ll spend hours in three different group texts trying to figure out which friends want to go and which do not until it gets so confusing that I just buy a block of tickets so everyone can decide later. Which means I’m usually scrambling to sell the tickets or remembering who was in for which event.

Then things don't quite feel like the magical experience I envisioned when my daughter begs for downtime and to “chill at home” after a late night does her in—and she can’t comprehend that I arranged (and paid for!!) these “special activities” that didn’t even exist when I was growing up!

Except, I get where she’s coming from. Here’s a peek in my mind—as soon as I update my calendar and realize how filled up it’s become—I resent not having a weekend to relax too. Even though the holidays dominate my life from Thanksgiving to New Year’s Day—I still have to work. I know, so weird that none of my editors offer the month of December off—with pay—right?

So now I have no time to buy the ugly sweaters and holiday bling for school spirit week...sure, I can go online to purchase toys for the toy drive but I still have to drop them off in person. Then there’s the canned food drive and since when did soup get so expensive?

We opted not to participate in the holiday show this year—but only because we have gymnastics on Tuesday nights and art class on Thursday nights and I couldn’t bear another night of dinner in the car, yelling to get out the door a mere five minutes after coming home from school, and then first starting homework at 8 pm.

And remember how I said that my childhood Hanukkah was low-key? Well, I don’t know how to do low-key gifts—even though we threaten every year to take it down a notch. I’m shopping, wrapping, and re-wrapping up until the last minute.

I overwork myself because I could probably pay off my mortgage with the amount I end up spending this time of year. It’s not just family gifts. It’s also teachers, babysitters, and tipping everyone from our mailman to my hairdresser.

My daughter celebrates Hanukkah EVERY night like it’s the first night AND the world is ending. Every night she gets a big present from me and my husband—which means I have put much thought into the theme and wrapping of every single one.

So my nights that would normally be for watching Bravo or scrolling endlessly on my phone are now all about wrapping presents. In addition to my daughter, we have big families on both sides. I also can’t help myself when I see something cute that my friend group would love even though we never discussed our thoughts on exchanging.

But don’t worry, even though we opted out of the holiday show to free up some time— I should mention that I am the classroom mom—and my daughter is one of two Jews in her class this year so of course I offered to come in and celebrate Hanukkah.

But Hanukkah started a full two weeks before we break for the holidays this year so now I have to come back for the all-encompassing classroom holiday party (which I’m also planning—and that includes coming up with a craft, goodie bag, and more). Finally, there’s the school-wide holiday sing-along on the morning of the last day of school before winter break—which is also an early dismissal day.

Every year I crave those days between Christmas and New Year’s Day when the world seems to shut down, you have permission to stay in your pajamas till lunch and not leave the coziness of your house for days. I think I’m going to be so happy that we don’t know what day it is and have nothing scheduled and nowhere to be . . .  but all I can do is start thinking about my daughter’s birthday festivities in January and stress over the empty weekends in February and fire the group chats up again to make sure we are booked up until Hanukkah and Christmas come around again.

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