You want to connect, but your partner feels far away. What can you do?
You’ve had a hard day, but you hesitate to tell your partner about it. You try to start a conversation but they don’t seem to have anything to say or to be listening. When you tell them how you’re feeling, they’re dismissive. These are all qualities that people use to describe an emotionally unavailable partner.
It’s a truly lonely predicament, Lynn Fainsilber Katz, Ph.D, a clinical psychologist, research professor at the University of Washington, and certified Gottman Couples Therapist tells Woman’s Day. “It’s really a very painful experience in a relationship,” she explains. “Partners end up feeling quite isolated from each other and lonely, and often look elsewhere for emotional support.”
But here’s the catch-22: trying to draw your partner out often pushes them farther away, exactly the opposite of what your goal is.
So what can you do if you feel like you’re not as close as you once were? Woman’s Day spoke with two psychologists to find out what to do when your partner is emotionally unavailable.
jon: They left out the really greats, Thomas Jefferson, who gave us the Louisiana Purchase, James Polk, who gave us all the western states, and yes, Andrew Johnson, who gave us Alaska. In my thinking, these were great presidents that gave us all of the land currently in the U.S., and never get mentioned in these so called great president stories.