Mommy Frenemies

Let's talk for a moment about Mommy Frenemies. Like spider veins, we all have them.

The Mommius frenemius (Mommy Frenemy) is the largest predatory threat to mothers.

Obnoxium Backstabbius Frenemius:

Classification: Mean Girls

The Mommy Frenemy is indigenous to environments where children and women gather. The frenemius species are conniving, predatory and perhaps most dangerously, seemingly friendly.

General characteristics of the Mommy Frenemy include:
- A sugary sweet persona
- Judgmental behavior beneath the persona
- Superiority
- Repeated self-proclamation of their gifted children
- Self-involved
- Cattiness
- Idle gossip

It seems no matter how hard we try to limit our exposure to the Mommy Frenemy, they are always there; in our business or worse yet, in our children's business.As a working Mommy Friend, I generally encounter the Mommy Frenemy variety at my son's school because, sadly, I really only ever there for conferences or school functions. They generally like to tell me things they think I'd be upset to hear. Things like, "[Eldest] talks a lot in class, Mrs. XYZ struggles with him" or "We never see you here". Um, OK, thanks and I haven't even learned your name yet.

The Mommy Frenemy is out to spot weakness and prey on the unsuspecting souls of their fellow mothers. I cannot be party to such nonsense; I have a greater purpose than to bring one of my own down.

My mommying answers to my children, not a bitter mother.

Moral of the story: Beware the wolf in sheep's clothing (and super cute shoes).

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