It's my baby & I can choose Cesarean if I want to

Militant moms, you know who you are. You offer endless unwanted advice about everything from amnio to c-sections, and you judge those of us who dare to have a different opinion from yours. Well, it's my turn to talk, so listen -- and listen closely: You are sucking the joy out of my pregnancy. Stop it, already. I'm begging you!

Since I went public with my expectant-mom status, I've been lectured on why c-sections are evil, how getting amnio is dangerous (one friend even asked me disapprovingly why I wanted to "prick" my baby), and why choosing not to breastfeed is like child abuse. So far, I haven't gotten the sermon about day care, but it's coming. I can feel it.

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"How can any new mother in her right mind not at least try to nurse?" one pal preached. "I mean there are all these studies!"

"C-sections are awful," another mom chided. "Our neighbor said she went through hell. I really hope you aren't actually planning to have one!"

Sigh.

Don't even get me started on all the flak I've gotten over baby names. This one means "nasty" in Russian. That one sounds like a brand of face cream. I dated a guy by that name -- he was a total ass.

I used to think people who chose not to tell anyone their picks were weird and took themselves too seriously. Now I'm with them, 100 percent. So you moms (and some dads) who think it's your place to chime in about someone else's names need to keep your mouths shut. It's not your baby!

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My husband wryly suggested floating "dummy names" -- decoys -- so people would get an answer to their question but we'd be spared their opinions on the real ones. He also thinks vague comments about things like amnio and child care are the way to go. Ah, hindsight ...

Look, this is the first time I've been pregnant. It definitely isn't all fun and games (hello, constant bloating!), but it is an exciting time. I just want to sit back, feel the baby grow, pick out cute names without a peanut gallery, and be happy about it. I don't want other know-it-all moms to shove their views in my face and make me worry that I'm doing something wrong. I probably am, but let me! These are personal decisions!

And who asked you, anyway?

Are know-it-all moms hijacking your pregnancy?






Image via the Italian voice/Flickr

Written by Catherine Donaldson-Evans for CafeMom's blog, The Stir.

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