The worst gifts I've ever received from a man (don't buy these for your wife!)

A cleaver-
You know, I needed this and I use it. But there was still something sad and unromantic (and I think bad luck?) about opening a gift from a significant other and finding a giant knife.

Let me state this up front: I'm not an ungrateful person. In fact, I love getting almost any kind of gift and have always been super thankful that anyone has thought about me at all. For the most part, I feel like it is the thought that counts and, honestly, what kind of person insults someone's gift? HOWEVER, over the years, there have been a few presents that outright hurt my feelings, that seemed suspiciously selfish, bought simply out of obligation or without any care at all. These gifts, despite my best efforts, made the holiday experience tense and weird. I've listed them as a cautionary tale above-more like a public service, than an outright complaint. Do you have gifts you've hated?