1. If a good customer buys a dress, I'll hang it up for her and put it in a nice plastic bag. But if you've been rude to me, I'll smush it into a bag that's too small.
2. Sure, I'll put that sweater on hold for you. But most of the time, you don't come back. So don't blame me if I sell it to someone else.
3. Even though I seem friendly, I'm not your friend. Please don't take me hostage with your small talk.
4. I won't ask a yes-or-no question like "Can I help you?" Instead, it's always an open-ended "What can I help you find today?"
5. It is way tacky to buy placemats, use them for your party, then return them to the store. At least wipe off the food crumbs first.
6. My pet peeve? Customers who paw through a stack of shirts. Now I've got to spend 15 minutes board-folding that whole pile again
7. This is not a garage sale. I can't give you a lower price just because you haggle.
8. Even though most of us don't work on commission, sometimes we're given a sales goal for each customer. If we meet it consistently, we'll get bonuses and, eventually, a promotion. So when I tell you about a pair of earrings that would go perfectly with that sweater, I might have an ulterior motive.
9. If you start to throw a fit in front of other customers because I won't take a return, I'll probably give in and offer your money back. But I really want to kick your tush.
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10. After you buy something, keep your receipt and pay attention. Most mainstream retailers promise a refund if the item goes on sale within a certain number of days after you buy it. Websites like priceprotectr.com track the prices of hundreds of products from retailers such as Best Buy, Amazon, and Sears.
11. Need me? Don't wave like you're hailing a cab, whistle, yell across the store or stand in front of the fitting room waiting for it to magically open. Just ask nicely.
12. When you ask me if something looks good on you and I suggest a different style, take the hint.
13. The greeters who welcome you to our store aren't really there to greet you. If we look you in the eye as you're coming and going, you're less likely to shoplift.
14. Most shoplifters aren't the people you'd expect. They're great customers who come in all the time, buy a lot of stuff, and are really nice to you. I guess they're thinking, 'I'm a good customer, I deserve a little something.'