Sometimes, things work out just the way they should. But, as we all know, sometimes they don’t — and those times can definitely cast a pall on future experiences. Susan Sarandon’s daughter Eva Amurri Martino shared her “nervous” ultrasound experience on Friday, vulnerably opening up about her past miscarriage and the ways that grief still affects her.
Eva and her husband Kyle Martino shared the big news about baby No. 3 earlier this week by way of her blog, Happily Eva After. The baby, who is due in the spring of 2020, will join siblings Marlowe Mae, 5, and Major James, 2 ½. Naturally, Eva is on cloud nine about adding to her sweet brood. However, she took to her Instagram Stories after a routine prenatal visit and ultrasound to share with fans why the experience was bittersweet. “I was way more nervous for this ultrasound than I think I really realized,” she said, adding that it had been a while since they’d gotten to hear the new baby’s heartbeat.
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And that gap, for someone who’s suffered a miscarriage, can lead to anxious thoughts. “Even though obviously I look pregnant and I’m growing, when you’ve had a loss before, it’s just scary,” Eva said. “You’re just kind of always waiting for the other shoe to drop.”
That wasn’t the only reason Eva was particularly nervous during this visit — it was also the first ultrasound of this pregnancy that she’d brought Marlowe and Major to. “The last time that I brought Marlowe to an ultrasound was actually the ultrasound I found out that the baby had passed away,” Eva shared. “She was in the room with me expecting to see the baby, and then we found that out. So, I have this PTSD thing about my kids being there for an ultrasound.”
This time, Eva and Kyle came up with a system. The kids would stay outside of the room until the doctors gave the all-clear. Happily, baby is doing well… and so is Mama. “I’m so proud of myself for overcoming that challenge. It was not easy for me. I just feel so grateful everything is fine and the baby is healthy and great,” Eva explained. “Baby Martino, going strong!”
Best wishes to the whole family as they continue to countdown to their new addition’s arrival. And kudos to Eva for so courageously and candidly discussing her loss so that other women going through the same thing might feel less alone.