How to Start Gratitude Journaling With Your Family

Gratitude journaling is a powerful tool that can help create a growth mindset in kids—and adults. Here's how to create the healthy habit with your family.

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This year, we hosted Thanksgiving and had our family write the things they were most grateful for on a piece of paper. It was my 9-year-old daughter Mila’s responsibility to make sure everyone participated. She then hung the responses on a banner that we displayed over the table where we enjoyed our meal. Mila took great pride in her job and was truly inspired and touched by the exercise.

Given the current state of the world, It’s become increasingly important to me that gratitude becomes more than just a holiday tradition and instead a regular addition to our routine. And there’s no time like the New Year to incorporate something new and affirming into our daily lives.

Many years ago, during a particularly rough time in my life (laid off from work, worried about bills, and so on), my therapist recommended ending each day by jotting down five things that I was grateful for in a dedicated journal. I made this a regular practice for a few months and it greatly improved my mood and mindset—writing down the things I was grateful for, as simple as my family, coffee, or even Bravo TV, brought me joy, even if for just a few seconds. I gradually stopped that practice even though it was an exercise I enjoyed. I’ve decided it’s time to bring it back into my routine—and this time with my daughter and husband’s participation.

Sapna Radhakrishnan, conscious parenting coach, NLP practitioner, and author of Yelling to Zenning, says research shows that practicing gratitude rewires young minds for positivity. "By reflecting on what they're thankful for, kids build self-awareness, develop coping mechanisms for stress, and foster a sense of optimism.”

And Radhakrishnan believes one of the best times to start a gratitude practice is the New Year, explaining, "It's a powerful way to set your family on a path of joy and growth. By doing so, you can create for a family a year filled with kids who approach challenges with resilience and optimism, a family that celebrates each other's successes and supports each other through struggles and a home brimming with gratitude, laughter, and connection."

If you're looking to start the healthy habit in the new year—or any time—here are some expert tips and advice on creating a gratitude journal with your children, making it part of your routine, and why bringing this practice into your family's lives is so valuable.

Choosing a Journal

There’s no right or wrong type of journal to use as a “gratitude” journal. Let your kids have fun with it by either choosing a notebook at the store that they really love because of its color and cover—or have them decorate a plain notebook—they can use stickers or their own drawings.

Dr. Monika Roots, child/adolescent psychiatrist and co-Founder at Bend Health, suggests having your kids include the date at the top of each entry. “This allows them to look back and reflect on all the positive things in their life,” she says.

If you have older kids who prefer to use their computer or Smartphone, Dr. Roots encourages allowing them to add their entries digitally if they desire. They may be more inclined to add regular entries if they can do so “on the go.”  And if your children are younger and not quite ready to write in a journal, Roots suggests encouraging them to draw what they are grateful for instead. “Creating a visual representation can be helpful for kids of all ages to express their emotions.”

And notebooks are not a hard and fast rule. Dr. Jenny Woo, author of 52 Essential Life Skills for Kids, got creative with what “journaling” means for her family because she didn’t want her kids to feel like gratitude journaling was a chore. “Instead, we make it a bonding family experience. Once a week during dinner—or dessert—we spend five minutes writing down things we’re grateful for on separate, colorful Post-It Notes,” Dr. Woo explains. “We take turns sharing what we’re grateful for before folding up the papers and putting them in our ‘Family Gratitude Jar.’”

Gratitude Journal Prompts

To get your children in a gratitude mindset—which can encourage a growth mindset— Radhakrishnan says to start simple. “Encourage your kids to list three things they're grateful for each day, big or small—such as sunshine, a funny joke, or a hug from Mom.”

She suggests providing creative prompts that will get them thinking such as "What made you smile today?"

Dr. Roots also recommends using the “JOY” acronym by having your kids write and answer the following in their journals:

J (Joy) - What is one thing that brought you joy today?

O (Others) - What is one thing you can do tomorrow to bring joy to others?

Y (You) - What is one quality about yourself that you are grateful for?

No matter how you prompt your kids to start journaling, Dena Farash, a positive discipline parenting educator and parent coach, recommends doing so with “no rules and no boundaries.” It's the approach she takes with her daughters as they all begin each day writing in their gratitude journals. “What they feel in their heart is what they write on the paper.” Farash says. “It’s important you don’t course correct or judge what your children are writing. Always accept what your children are grateful for.”

Creating a Gratitude Routine

As with any new goal or habit, Dr. Roots says it’s important to be realistic about how often your family can commit to writing in a gratitude journal based on your schedules, lifestyle, and yes, attention span, especially with younger kids. Do you have time to write once a day? Or once a week?

Roots also suggests “habit stacking,” which is simply adding this new habit of gratitude journaling to something already on their schedule, making it a part of a routine. For example, make gratitude journal time right after brushing teeth or every morning while eating breakfast. “Starting a new habit is hard, and it’s normal to experience setbacks,” says Dr. Roots. “If your child misses a few days of journaling, encourage them to pick right up where they left off.”

Everlasting Benefits

The benefits of gratitude journaling extend beyond individual well-being. It strengthens family bonds. Dorothy Cascerceri Simone, a mom of two in Greenwich, Conn.,  was overjoyed to discover that her son’s second-grade curriculum included a daily gratitude journal.

“He’s asked each morning to write ‘I am grateful for....’ in his homework book,” she explains. “The other night, we were sitting in the living room with the Christmas tree lit, and he said, ‘I think we should all just stop for a minute and feel thankful and reflect. Not everyone has a family like ours.’ It was music to my ears because I’ve been the one to make our family stop and reflect on how lucky we are—it was great to hear it echoed back!”

Radhakrishnan says by making gratitude journaling a family practice, it creates space for meaningful conversations, connection, appreciation, and understanding. “Kids learn to appreciate the little things that make their family special,” she says. “Gratitude journaling reduces stress and conflict because gratitude fosters a more positive and peaceful home environment.”

Dr. Woo can also attest to the positive ways gratitude journaling has helped her family thrive. “I’ve noticed better attitudes and manners in my kids. They express more words of appreciation and are gentler toward each other,” she explains. “There have been times when my kids go into a gratitude journaling session as disgruntled siblings, complaining about each other, and leave as cheerful playmates full of silly giggles.”

As my daughter goes through the ups and downs of being a “tween,” complete with friendship drama, anxiety (over everything from schoolwork to rehearsing for her theater class show), and managing big emotions, it’s important to me and my husband that she isn’t consumed by these growing pains. Turning to gratitude to find a few moments of peace is a practice I look forward to starting with my family in the new year ahead.  

Related: Kids Need Access to Mental Health Days

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