SPOILERS: Another 'Bachelor' Proposal, Really?!

Alex Rees
Updated
Photo credit: ABC
Photo credit: ABC

From Cosmopolitan

OK so who wasn't rooting for Lauren B. to hit the After the Final rose stage with a "surprise, bitch" speech and kick Arie's flat ass to the curb? Lauren, we were all rooting for you!

But obviously the ending to a Bachelor season that's been one big disappointment after another would be...disappointing. After coming out on stage, Lauren said she's still in love with Arie, apparently even more so than he was before, and spouted a bunch of nonsense also about how he's a honest and loving and a good person I forget the specifics because really, who's buying it? I am not!

"Was it all worth it?" Chris Harrison asked them of their relationship's journey to the present day. "It was for me," Arie said, with Lauren adding, "definitely, for me too." And then Chris told them he's happy for them both and then honestly I was about to fart and call it a night except THEN ARIE FUCKING PROPOSED TO LAUREN WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS I HATE IT SO MUCH HELP MAKE IT STOP?!?!? Lauren said yes, obvs, and then they kissed and I'm sure they're happy but a lot of other people are dying inside right now. (As a reminder, again, Becca, the woman Arie had been engaged to until literally last month, was likely sitting backstage.)

Oh, and Chris Harrison was like wow I didn't see this coming and it's like, Chris, you numbnut, you literally started the show by teasing the possibility of another proposal.

In conclusion:

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