How Soon Is Too Soon To Propose? 25 Signs You're Ready

Here's how to know if you're actually ready to say "I do."

When you fall head over heels in love with that special someone, you may start hearing the wedding bells ring. Dating can be a fun and exciting adventure, and deepening a partnership into marriage could be even more thrilling. There is nothing better than knowing you're in a happy, fruitful relationship you want to last for a lifetime. But, the thought can also bode the common question in your mind—how soon is too soon to propose?

Spoiler alert: There is no perfect, one-size-fits-all timeline for couples getting engaged. Only you and your partner can decide what's best for your relationship. So, thinking about popping the question? There are some important things to consider.

Related: 25 Green Flags in a Relationship That Point to a Healthy Partnership

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One 2015 study of 3,000 married couples found that waiting at least a year before popping the big question significantly increases the odds of a successful marriage. For instance, couples who date for one to two years before getting engaged are 20 percent less likely to get divorced than those who get engaged in less than a year. Many relationship experts have simply agreed that it's best practice to wait for the honeymoon stage to pass.

If you're asking yourself, "Is it too early to propose?", we have the answers to your questions and more below.

Related: Give the Gift of Quality Time! 125 Swoon-worthy Ways To Speak Your Partner’s Love Language

How Soon Is Too Soon To Propose?

Being in a happy relationship does not equate to being ready to get married. Although every couple is different, here are some key signs that it may be too early in your relationship for you to propose:

1. You don't fully trust your partner yet.

2. You hold differing views on important life matters that would be tough to get past.

3. You're not financially ready.

4. You've hardly spent any time with your partner.

5. You haven't had your first real argument.

6. You don't know much about their past or how they treat others.

Related: Experts Say There Are 4 Major Stages to Every Relationship: Which One Are You In?

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25 Signs You're Ready To Propose

1. You're on the same page or have had conversations about important life matters

For example, you've talked about your views on kids, religion, politics, etc. How many kids do you picture yourself having? Is going to church important to you? How do you usually vote, and what factors influence your politics?

2. You've discussed marriage and see a future together

If you've already started having conversations about your wedding day or are making plans to buy a house together, it's a sign that you both are on the same page moving forward.

Related: 365 Reasons Why I Love You—Ideas for a Sentimental Note To Share Every Day of the Year

3. You're aware of one another's financial standing

Finances can be a huge source of conflict and stress for couples. Knowing if your partner has any outstanding debt or savings, and having a general idea of their financial standing is essential in taking that next big step together.

4. You simply can't imagine your life without them

If you're beyond the honeymoon stage and have a hard time imagining your life minus your partner, they're the one for you. Don't question it!

5. You both trust each other and are not withholding secrets

Could you imagine if you were withholding a huge secret from your significant other, and they found out? Mutual trust is a key point in a successful marriage, so you will want to make sure both of your closets are clear of skeletons. Or, they've at least been discussed.

6. You have made major life decisions together

Have you already bought a house or leased an apartment together? Have you adopted a pet? If you've already made major life decisions as a unit, it's good proof that you can continue doing so in the future.

Related: 150 Best Relationship Quotes and Sweetest Couple Quotes That'll Make Your Heart Flutter

7. You feel in your gut that they're your person

As the saying goes, "When you know...you know."

8. You know how to communicate and get through large conflicts with each other

Conflicts and arguments will happen. It's human nature, have you ever gotten along with anyone in your life 100% of the time? The key is knowing how to calmly communicate with each other and work through it.

9. When making life decisions, you think about it as "we" versus "only me"

It may seem small, but it's a significant mindset shift. When you start considering your partner in the equation while planning your future, it shows that you envision each other as a team.

10. You've been happily living with each other for a while

Living with anyone can be a tough gig. But, living with a significant other can really make people butt heads. If you've been happily cohabitating with your partner for a while, you'll be able to maintain that peace in the long run.

Related: Welcome to the Era of Infla-dating—Here Are the 80 Best Cheap Date Ideas For You and Your Boo

11. You feel totally comfortable being yourself around them

There's always that inevitable, early relationship stage consisting of making yourself appear flawless to the other: minding your manners, dressing up a little extra, holding in your gas. Starting to drop that mask around your partner shows a high level of comfort in being yourself.

12. You trust that you both have the best intentions for each other

People always make honest mistakes. But, you have no doubt in your mind that you both hold each other in high regard and have only the purest intentions at heart.

13. You'd rather be with them than alone or with anybody else

This is a huge one, especially for the introverts out there.

14. You've seen them at their worst and they've seen you at your worst, and you both love each other despite it

It's easy to experience someone at a low point and perceive them in a different, negative light. If you've seen your partner at their lowest, most unlovable moments and still love them afterward, it shows that you won't run away when stuff gets ugly.

15. They're the only person that can make you consistently smile when you've been having a bad day

Think about your most recent bad day. Was your lover able to make you smile or at least feel comforted during your hard moments?

Related: Cut Out the Silence! 200 Questions Every Couple Should Ask Each Other

16. You both have decided you're ready to make a lifetime commitment to each other and mean it

If you've already discussed making a lifetime commitment at large and are ready to choose each other, what are you waiting for?

17. You are both aware of each other's past relationships, previous marriages, or children

This relays back to ensuring that you're both aware of each other's past skeletons and secrets. It's important to know that there are no lingering past relationships that the other should worry about.

18. You see each other as equals in a partnership and are committed to being on the same team

Neither partner in a relationship should feel less, or like they owe the other one something. You both see each other as equals and treat each other accordingly.

19. You know their strengths and weaknesses

If you've ever played sports or been part of a team, you're well aware that every teammate has individual strengths and weaknesses. Knowing these things about each other will help you both figure out where you shine, and what you can work on to help the relationship grow.

20. You have mutual respect for one another

Respect for each other has to be conditional. This means it can't fly out the window when you and your partner get into an argument. If you and your partner can maintain mutual respect for each other, it will get you through even the toughest moments together.

Related: Stumped on What to Say for Your Wedding Anniversary? Here Are 100 Happy Anniversary Wishes!

21. You don't see any life obstacle you can't tackle together

The honeymoon stage blinds people. It can even trick them into thinking a relationship landscape is full of ripe peaches and beautiful roses. Newsflash: it's not. But, knowing this and feeling like you and your hopeful spouse-to-be can still get through any tough situation together is a positive sign.

22. You don't feel pressured to propose, it's coming from your own intrinsic motivation

Nobody should ever feel peer-pressured into proposing. Getting married is a huge life decision and one that should come solely from the proposer's heart.

23. You're aware of each other's goals and dreams and are both equally supportive

It would crush anyone to get roped into a marriage where their spouse isn't supportive of their goals and dreams. Make sure to discuss these important conversations at length before popping the question.

24. You've hit rough spots, had arguments, and gotten through all of them together

Nobody likes to argue or go through rough patches in relationships. However, successfully tackling these issues communicates that there's not much you both aren't willing to work through.

25. The thought of a lifetime commitment to them doesn't feel scary or anxiety-inducing

Does the thought of marrying your partner fill you up with childlike excitement, joy, and love? Or, does it make you feel terrified and anxious? If you're choosing the first, you're ready for the big day.

Next, Should I Propose Before or After Dinner? All Your Engagement Questions—Answered by the Pros

Sources

• Francis-Tan, A., & Mialon, H. M. (2015). “A diamond is forever” and other fairy tales: The relationship between wedding expenses and marriage duration. Economic Inquiry, 53(4), 1919–1930. https://doi.org/10.1111/ecin.12206