These Are the Most Intimate Sex Positions to Try With Your Partner
Here’s a fact that’s not entirely surprising: Having sex with your partner is one of the best things you can do to build intimacy in your relationship.
That’s because sex can mark the beginning of something new, celebrate a long-time love, mend a conversation gone wrong, grow your family, or simply just feel really damn good. It can be fast and passionate, slow and romantic, and just as emotional as it is physical.
But whether you’re going through a slight dry spell or feeling a bit disconnected—which, by the way, is totally normal—maintaining that intimacy can feel tough, especially if you’ve been with your partner for a long time.
The fix: Carve out some time to have the kind of sex that reminds you of why your relationship is so special. Whether you’re rekindling the flame of a well-established love or fostering a deeper connection with someone new, these intimate sex positions are guaranteed to make you feel closer to your partner.
Spooning
Why it’s great: Having sex while wrapped in a constant embrace not only makes you physically closer to your partner, but emotionally as well. Being touched in a loving way will raise your levels of oxytocin (also known as the love hormone) and PEA (a neurotransmitter associated with bonding), says Deb Laino, DHS, a Delaware-based relationship therapist and certified sex educator.
How to do it: Have your partner lie directly behind you (or vice versa), while you lie on your sides facing the same direction. If your partner is the one behind you, bend your knees slightly and push your bottom further back for easier access. This gives your partner the freedom to use his or her hands to caress your body or whisper into your ear. The best part? You can put on your favorite show afterward and continue your cuddle session as you sleep.
Doggy style
Why it’s great: Because you are facing away from your partner, doggy style may not seem like an intimate position, but it facilitates one of the best ways to bond: shared orgasms. For women, this position gives deep penetration that can lead to immense pleasure, says Sara Nasserzadeh, PhD, a psychosexual therapist based in Palo Alto, California. “This is a high-adrenaline-rush physical act, and having that shared experience will increase bonding,” she says.
How to do it: Get on your hands and knees to allow your partner to enter you from behind (and be vocal if you need more gentle motions!). If you have a hard time staying up on your knees, you can modify the position so you’re lying face down on your stomach with your hips raised.
Standing doggy in the shower
Why it’s great: Sex in the shower allows you to take it long and slow, says Eric Marlowe Garrison, a certified sex counselor and author of Mastering Multiple Position Sex. The warm water, ambient noise, and fresh scents will relax your body and allow you to really connect with your partner in sensual way. As an added bonus, the water provides extra lubrication for easier penetration.
How to do it: For this modified version of doggy style, stand with your back facing your partner’s chest (or vice versa), so that both of you are in the warm water. Massage each other and enjoy your full bodies touching before your partner enters from behind, reaching around for nipple or clitoral stimulation. Pro tip: While it sounds silly, shower sex can lead to unpleasant accidents if you’re not careful, so take precautions to avoid slipping. A textured bath mat can go a long way in keepings things fun (and safe).
The chair
Why it’s great: This position also has you facing away from your partner, but can feel exciting and sexy—especially since the partner sitting down gets an erotic view. Women on top will also have an easier time having a clitoral and G-spot orgasm in this position, says Moushumi Ghose, certified sex therapist and author of Classic Sex Positions Reinvented. “The key is finding the right spot inside the vagina and building up the intensity and speed,” she says.
How to do it: Chairs are not just for sitting, people! First, start with foreplay in bed: Touch, kiss, play, and massage each other’s bodies. Then, have your partner sit on a chair (or dresser...or desk—up to you!) while you sit right on top, facing away from them. This allows for deep penetration while you move your hips up and down, in circles, or back and forth. To increase intimacy even further, have your partner reach around to stimulate your erogenous zones.
Missionary
Why it’s great: Missionary can feel basic, but it’s really up to you to take full advantage of the moment. In fact, this sex position is ideal for boosting intimacy, because you are able to connect with your partner through sight, sound, and touch—all of which facilitate bonding, says Nasserzadeh.
How to do it: The logistics of missionary position are pretty simple, but there are other things you can do to increase the intensity of your orgasm. Whisper or breathe in your partner’s ear, make eye contact, kiss, or simply feel your bodies touch from head to toe. To take things up a notch, use a vibrator for extra clitoral stimulation as your partner thrusts.
Woman on top
Why it’s great: Woman on top is a classic twist on missionary. You get all the intimate benefits of direct eye contact, sensual touches, and sexy sounds—but much more control when it comes to depth of penetration.
How to do it: Straddle your partner, alternating between fast, deep, slow, and shallow thrusts to experience both clitoral and G spot stimulation. To make things feel even more intimate, come down to your partner’s level so your chests are touching.
Seated lotus
Why it’s great: The seated lotus offers the face-to-face intimacy of missionary with the excitement of a new position. Here, your bodies are touching entirely, and your faces are close enough to kiss, whisper, or laugh together, says Rachel Needle, PsyD, a certified sex therapist in West Palm Beach, Florida.
How to do it: Have your partner sit with legs loosely crossed, while you sit on top with your legs wrapped around his back. For added intensity, focus on moving up and down with slow, sensual movements, says Needle.
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