Selma Blair pours heart out about battling alcoholism and depression — and hoping to land good roles again

Suzy Byrne
·Editor, Yahoo Entertainment
Selma Blair at a celebration of the Aerin Collection by Williams Sonoma on May 9. (Photo: Stefanie Keenan/Getty Images for Aerin)
Selma Blair at a celebration of the Aerin Collection by Williams Sonoma on May 9. (Photo: Stefanie Keenan/Getty Images for Aerin)

Among the Kardashian bikini pics and other drivel on Instagram today, there was Selma Blair, pouring her damn heart out.

The actress, who has appeared in Legally Blonde and Cruel Intentions, and let’s not forget she played a Kardashian (Kris Jenner in American Crime Story), posted a really raw, honest social media post about her 20-plus years in Hollywood. And she made it clear it hasn’t been all sunshine and roses, mentioning how she has “battled alcoholism and depression and anxiety” (she’s currently “winning”) and “hasn’t had hope I will really work again” now that she’s in her mid-40s and has actually lived a bit. The post, which she shared Tuesday on Instagram, is “heart on sleeve” honesty.

I came to Los Angeles over twenty years ago. I lived in this cute studio apt in Brentwood. I met my best friend next door. Hi @lisa.arenson . I met a cute guy and I am still pals with his sister . Hi @kimgarvinferrier I had all the hope in the world. Auditions came. Work came. I kissed a girl . Hi @sarahmgellar ! I made friends. I lost many and miss some. I battled alcoholism and depression and anxiety. I am now winning that battle. Hi a much better life! I worked with some of the best directors, hi #toddsolondz, #guillermodeltoro, @rogerkumble @robertluketic @paulfeig . I did Some shit jobs too. I ate some shit. I worked with @karllagerfeld and @prada . Hi icons! I was mentored by the incomparable #ingridsischy and loved by #carriefisher. Hi more grief! I laughed loudly and wept even more loudly. Hi New Years 2008! I have had my closest friends work hard for me.. hi @thetexastroya and @kristasmith @jaime_king @juliedesanto @michnader @anneagleton @rrichnyc @yesornoah @brianbowensmith @benleemusic @ioneskyelee @mattboren @tarasubkoff @bonnyrburke and especially @csiriano ⭐️.!standing by. Being a part of my team. I had a son. Hi Arthur! I lived with #postpartumdepression for 4 long years. Crippling anxiety. I fell apart. The last moment being very public. I was sorry. I was humbled. I stayed humble. I even found support on these pages. Hi @voltaire_no.5 @therealthaibarani @bradley.dock @urawinner7272 @jimfarrellxx @hoora_smart @juliachastain @juliarestoinroitfeld @maas.art @noah.d.newman @jaredeng ! and so many other moms. I got better. The weight of grief began to lift. I still struggle. I cry quietly so as not to wake my child. I am a good mother. But I have always been an actress. An actress who hasn’t had hope I will really work again. Now, when I finally have a well to draw from. It could all change on some Tuesday afternoon. For better or for worse. I want to have hope again. I want to thank you all for believing in me.I want to find the right work for me. And for me as a mom and as a woman who has come so far in personal ways. I want to make us all proud. 21 years later. #heartonsleeve. It’s a random Tuesday. Maybe miracles will happen ⭐️ #actress

A post shared by Selma Blair (@selmablair) on May 15, 2018 at 12:06pm PDT

The gist was that after having really big early success (great roles, great directors, great mentors, great external opportunities for her being the faces of various fashion houses), she battled demons — which we know from her infamous 2016 midflight “psychotic blackout” while traveling with her son, Arthur, and his father, designer Jason Bleick.

While “I am now winning that battle,” she wrote, it took work getting there. Her troubles included four years of postpartum depression after the birth of her son, whom she is now a single mom to, as well as “crippling anxiety. I fell apart. The last moment being very public. I was sorry. I was humbled. I stayed humble.” But, like many, “I still struggle,” she added. Only, “I cry quietly so as not to wake my child. I am a good mother.”

And there was some really candid stuff about working in Hollywood as a 45-year-old actress. Blair, who shared her ordeal with James Toback, said she hasn’t been optimistic about her future in the biz, which is especially crappy considering “I finally have a well to draw from.”

But as she navigates the uncertain water, she is thankful to her friends and fans for “believing in me. I want to find the right work for me. And for me as a mom and as a woman who has come so far in personal ways. I want to make us all proud.”

She added that she was putting it all out there — on a random Tuesday in a random social media post — because you never know. Maybe it will lead to good things.

And maybe it will. Until then, we’ll be replying to her post with fingers crossed, thumbs up, applause, and every other supportive emoji we can think of because that was a heaping dose of real talk on this “random Tuesday” — and she deserves some love for it.

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