Should Prince Harry invite his ex-girlfriend to the royal wedding?
People are whispering about the guest list for Prince Harry and Meghan Markle’s May wedding, particularly whether one person will make the cut: Harry’s ex-girlfriend Chelsy Davy.
“Both will be going through the list carefully,” a source told Us Weekly on Tuesday of the engaged couple. “Don’t expect to see Cressida invited — the two didn’t remain friends — but do not be surprised if Chelsy shows up with a date. The two have remained friends long after ending their relationship and still keep in touch to this day.”
The source added, “She congratulated him the minute the engagement news was announced. Meghan would have no problem with her being there and Chelsy was on the preliminary list of friends to invite.”
The prince dated Davy, 32 a former law student, from 2004 to 2011 and broke up reportedly due to Davy’s reluctance to embrace the royal lifestyle. According to the U.K. Sun, during their relationship, Davy met the Queen at a wedding and was invited to Prince Charles’ 60th birthday party at Highgrove House. And Davy even scored an invite to Prince William and Kate Middleton’s 2011 wedding.
The source also told US Weekly of Markle and the prince, “With the wedding, they both want to do things their way. While they will always be mindful of traditions and the views of their elders, the day is ultimately about them and what they want to do. The day of the wedding itself will certainly hold a few unconventional surprises. Don’t expect a royal wedding by numbers. They want to involve their friends and family as much in as much as possible throughout the day.”
People invite ex-partners to their weddings for all sorts of reasons — you have the same friends or coworkers, you share young children together, or you simply feel nostalgic — but according to Bethany Marshall, PhD., a Beverly Hills-based psychoanalyst, the gesture carried unintended consequences.
“Weddings are a template for how couples make decisions and problem-solve and the decision to invite an ex should be carefully considered among both people,” Marshall tells Yahoo Lifestyle.
It’s 100 percent possible to feel nothing but platonic love and fondness for an ex, but your partner could have a different interpretation. He, he or she may feel awkward with that person meeting friends and family, distort your intentions, or not want to share an important day with someone who once held a place in your heart — or let’s be real — your bed.
At the same time, not inviting this person, especially if they are entwined in your life by way of business, family history, or co-parenting, could offend. “Weddings are almost never just about the bride and groom,” says Marshall. “And parents and in-laws often have expectations for what they consider a family event.”
If you’re uncertain about whether to extend an invite, really think about it: Why you want your ex to celebrate your marriage? And will his or her presence undermine your relationship?
And make the decision with your soon-to-be spouse. “Many people believe that when they marry, their problems end,” says Marshall, “but marriage is the first step toward figuring out how to be a couple.”
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