People Are Sharing How They Wasted Their 20s, And It Truly Is A Reminder Of What A Hard Time In Your Life It Is To Navigate
Being in your 20s is all about discovering who you are. However, it's also a time where you feel invisible, have all the time in the world, and feel like you know it all — which could lead you to making life choices that end up being a huge waste that you might not have made if you had more wisdom and maturity.
And recently, Reddit user sageagios asked this serious question: "How did you 'waste' your 20s?"
Well, thousands of people opened up about how choices and things that happened to them made them 'waste' their 20s. And here are some of the top and best comments:
Please be aware the post does mention discussions about alcohol abuse.
1."I always thought I was already too old: Uh, I am 25, I'm too old."
"I remember saying 'I’m old' when I was 23. Now, I’m in my 30s, and I cringe thinking what an idiot I was. However, now I realize I’ll be saying the same sh** about my 30s in my 40s, so it gives me perspective to enjoy myself now. Today is the youngest you’ll ever be again, so enjoy it."
2."Treating the love of my life all wrong 'cause I thought I was all right."
"At least you realize that now, and that makes you able to grow. I bet a ton of people never see their own mistakes."
3."I was in the closet until I was 28, because I grew up in a conservative environment. It took me until my mid-20s to accept my gayness and start to get over my internalized homophobia that came from growing up in a conservative environment. And the fear of being rejected by friends and family kept me in the closet."
4."No ambition. Lack of foresight. No goals. I spent so much time stressing out about my future that I never actually lived in the present."
5."For me it was too much ambition early on in life, and then by the time my 20s came around, I became very disillusioned, felt like life was mundane and nothing brought joy to me anymore, so I hardly did anything. Literally wasted a bunch of time doing nothing."
6."Being sad about a failed relationship and career."
"Oh, yeah. It took me (38/M) until hitting 27 before I finally got over the toxic job and toxic relationships. Life dramatically improved after that."
7."Drinking heavily. Heeeavily. Will never get those years back. Thankfully, I realized while I couldn't go back and change the start, I could decide to change the ending. Ten years sober this month."
8."Too scared of my parents to stand up to them and live life how I want."
9."Being too shy. To anyone younger reading this: TAKE RISKS! Ask that person out. Go to that local event you’ve been eyeing. Strike up a conversation with a cool-looking stranger. Get up on stage at a karaoke night. Volunteer. Join a club. Life is not a movie, and there is no magical, special person that will notice you and come pull you into the light. You have to do that yourself."
10."Being scared of people and letting people take advantage of me. People would borrow what little money I had and never pay me back... My boundaries have gotten better in the last few years."
11."Didn't do any introspection and soul searching. I distracted myself with a lot of sh**. It took a few of the right kind of people to guide me to where I am now. By the way, the introspection and soul searching should be a constant thing. We shouldn't stop learning and thinking about ourselves and why we act the way we do."
12."Procrastinating. Anything that involved making some sort of appointment or phone call I always put off. Would generally try to devote time to doing errands all at once and putting things off instead of taking tasks on as they come. Keeping a calendar and making a checklist is something I adopted in my 30s, and I wish I started earlier."
13."Crippling social anxiety that I was in denial about. I’m on the other side now at 35, finally living a very socially-fulfilling life and finally pursuing a real career. I’m angry when I think about it, that I didn’t do these things when I was younger, but there isn’t anything I can do about it now."
"PSA: If you have a mental health issue holding you back, get that shit sorted! Talk to somebody."
14."No ambition, expected great things to just happen to me. Put almost no effort into college or finding a job after that. Finally landed a job at 27, working for a newspaper making low wages for second shifts that stole my weekends and afternoons."
"Never looked at the bigger picture of how much of my life I was wasting because I didn’t take the time to realize it could have been better. Finally shifted careers into IT, and at least, I have my weekends now in my 30s, and I’m making more but still a long way to go."
15."Didn't really have a game plan for making a living, and waited too long to figure one out. Also, was too caught up in my feelings to act on a lot of good dating options I didn't realize I had, which would have been fun. Things worked out great anyways, but still."
16."Far too much time spent on my career and not nearly enough on friends and family. Can't say it wasn't financially rewarding, but I'd give that all up for more time with friends and family who have since died."
"Same here. Now, I have nice house, car, financially stable life, etc., but I don't have friends. I'm jealous of those who have a group of friends and can have fun together."
17.And lastly: "I pursued a career in a field that wasn’t right for me."
"Thing about your 20s, no matter how you spent it, you'll wonder about the other path. Party, get wasted, spend everything you earn traveling the world, you'll wish you'd been more studious and built better foundations. Study hard, work diligently, build good foundations, you'll wish you'd partied and had more fun like the others did."
If you or someone you know is struggling with substance abuse, you can call SAMHSA’s National Helpline at 1-800-662-HELP (4357) and find more resources here.
You can read the full thread of responses on Reddit.
Note: Some responses have been edited for length and/or clarity.
