1."Sex on the beach. Sand and/or saltwater does not go well with sex."
2."Fighting. Movie heroes always take punches and are unscathed in the next scene, except for minor bruising. IRL, they’d be incapacitated for a few days and maybe suffer a concussion."
5."Being relentlessly pursued by someone you keep telling you are not interested. It's not romantic or comedic; it's just a mixture of stalking and harassment if you keep showing up in their life and/or throwing romantic gestures their way. Maybe you can try again at a later date if you feel your initial approach or the timing might have been off. But really, leave the other person alone until then. Truly alone — no following them in real life or on social media, even if they don't find out (they will), you will inevitably let something slip when you do reconnect, and that will be very bad."
6."Being a salesman. They make it look like you're a super hot shot with a fancy suit, a briefcase, and slick hair. Really, you're just going through 100 different clients until one of them says yes."
7."Dating. In the movies, there's a 'meet cute' followed by a montage of fun, romantic dates. Real life: awkwardness, uncertainty, insecurity, and dread."
"Yep, it's really bad. I guess if you have a rich-people shower with benches or multiple jets, it could be cool. In practice, someone is always freezing and you're trying not to slip and fall."
9."High-speed chases. My anxiety goes from 0 to 1,000 when someone rides my ass on a residential road with a low speed limit. I'd be shitting myself during a chase like the kind you see in movies."
12."Washing the dishes to upbeat music. Dishes are not fun."
13."Riding a motorbike without a helmet or eye protection or a jacket of some kind. In movies, it always looks cool and tense. In reality? Good luck driving at a higher speed without some form of eye protection; the wind resistance is killer. To say nothing of the bugs."
14."Flying in a helicopter. It’s fun for about the first hour or so. After that, picture somebody shaking you hour after hour. Helicopters aren’t smooth riding like fixed-wing aircrafts can be. There is a constant vibration, and at the end of several hours in a helicopter, you are exhausted. Plus, it’s very loud, so you have to wear ear protection. The movies always make helicopters seem so cool and glamorous, and they are for 20 minutes."
15."Living in NYC in your 20s. It’s so romanticized. In the movies, you’re living in a clean, safe neighborhood with one roommate in a gorgeous turn-of-the-century building with an elevator, commuting to your fun job with a smile on your face. In actuality, you live in a studio with three other people. The one bathroom is so small that the door doesn’t open all the way because it hits up against your toilet. You’re expected to be the first to arrive at the office because you’re the newest staff member. It’s summer, so the subway is humid and smells like piss, and the train you usually take is down, so you overshoot your stop and are now late to a job you hate."
16."Laying on grass. It looks so comfy, but it’s so damn itchy."
18."Football. In movies, it's always this action-packed sequence of touchdowns and tackles. In real life, they're lucky to go 14 inches before the whistle is blown, and they need to pause the game and re-set up. Tackles are much less common and not as impactful."
Affluent Americans may want to double-check how much of their bank deposits are protected by government-backed insurance. The rules governing trust accounts just changed.
Former NBA guard Darius Morris has died at the age of 33. He played for five teams during his four NBA seasons. Morris played college basketball at Michigan.