People Are Describing The First Time They Had Sex, And Let Me Tell You, The Range Is So Real

·6 min read

In movies and on TV, having sex for the first time is frequently glamorized to be an unforgettable, monumental moment with fireworks going off in the background. In reality, it's often... well, not that.

Redditor u/Graysie-Redux asked, "How would you describe the loss of your virginity?" and the wide range of answers revealed truth to the fact that first-time sex is super different for everyone. Here is a sampling of stories.

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Note: Some responses have been edited for length and clarity. 

1."Awkward but sweet. We had been planning it for weeks. She came over, and my parents left with my sister to go to her sixth-grade play. As soon as they left, we ran to my room, and we took our time."


2."Shaky. I was so nervous I couldn’t stop shaking, and she had to sit next to me to calm me down before we could proceed. Still shaky during."

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3."Lasted about 10 seconds. It was glorious."


4."Terrible, shameful, shallow. I was just heartbroken by someone who rejected me for being a virgin. So I went to a party and hooked up with the first person I could. Didn't last long, and it didn't feel like any kind of intimacy."


5."I thought it was like 30 minutes of intense fun — but after looking at the clock, only three minutes had passed. And foreplay was involved."


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6."We were teenagers. I was shy and inexperienced, and I think he might have also been a virgin in spite of all of the wild exploits he had bragged about. Imagine a starfish and the Energizer Bunny going at it for two hours. Not good."

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7."The condom broke. First time for both of us. I can’t remember anything about it except the terror."

Two hands holding up a condom
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8."It was OK, not terrible, not amazing. However, if I got the opportunity to go back and not lose it to that person, I would take that chance 100%."


9."At a high school party, five people in this room sleeping. It was dark AF, and the girl next to me started cuddling and nudging up to me. We both started getting touchy, and one thing led to another as we tried to be super quiet. I commence the ninja method of losing virginity: complete darkness and silence. It wasn't very long. So far, so good. She whispers gently in my ear, 'Oh, Travis.' I almost shat myself. My name is not Travis. Travis was a friend with a similar build. I stayed absolutely silent, got my pants on, walked right out of that room, and walked a very long walk home. There was never a word from anyone, even my friend on this. I never had the nerve to tell him, and we eventually fell out of touch."


10."I was in a loving, committed relationship with a partner that I trusted implicitly. I have zero regrets and am so thankful for that experience. I consider myself very lucky."


A couple holding hands in bed
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11."It hurt for both of us, and neither came. But she woke me up in the middle of the night for more, and thank god I got it right this time, or she would have probably moved on. She taught me everything I know. Thank you for your patience and for believing in me, Olivia."


12."Awkward teenage me thought inviting a girl over to play Kingdom Hearts was innocent. She had other plans."

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13."Dude brought a Magnum condom. It was way too big for him. He tied a knot at the top so it would fit. It slid off inside me. His ego was shattered, and he never wanted to have sex with me again."


14."Couldn’t get it up. The girl cried thinking she wasn’t hot enough (she was). After four to five hours passed, I was ready to roll…for 20 seconds, that is."


15."We were both virgins at the time, and it was hurting her. I told her I was stopping and we'll try again another time if she wanted to. We got dressed and she said thank you — and we just hung out and watched movies for the rest of the day."


Two pairs of feet tangled up in bed
Photographer, Basak Gurbuz Derma / Getty Images / Via Getty Images

16."I'm a guy. My best friend is a girl, and we did it to say we weren't virgins anymore and see what it was like. We wanted it to be with someone we knew. It probably sounds dumb or immature, but neither of us regrets it."


17."It was awkward. It was with my first girlfriend; she was five years older than me, so she definitely had more experience than me."


18."Anticlimactic. I was hooking up with a guy I knew from my hometown. I had done other things, except actual sex. We were hooking up and almost did it, but he was nervous. Next week we tried again and did it. Kinda hurt a little but yeah...pretty lame. In the backseat of my car, BTW."


19."It wasn't as magical because there wasn't the American Pie soundtrack playing to it."

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20."When I was 21 with my first serious boyfriend. It was very college but also very sweet. We were hanging out in his house Saturday evening when finally I was like: "I’m ready — let’s try this." He attempted to make it last-minute romantic by lighting lots of candles. As we were starting, his housemates started playing loud rap music and pregaming in the background. It should have ruined the moment, but we just started laughing, and actually it made us feel closer in a way. The actual sex was painful, and we had to stop halfway through, but still a special moment."


21."Ideal. We'd been together for almost three years by that point, and he'd patiently waited with no pressure on me. It was my decision, and we went together to get condoms. He was slow, gentle, and considerate. It hurt for a second, and then it was fine. Once we finished, we cuddled, then sat and ate canned pineapple and watched Fairly Oddparents."

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22."I built it up in my head that when I had sex, it would feel amazing with fireworks and earthquakes, and time would stand still. But after an hour of going at it, that was it. She enjoyed herself because she wasn't a virgin, but I was left lying there thinking, What was all the fuss about? I built it up way too much and put way too much pressure on myself. In the end, it's just sweaty, grunty grinding on each other. Afterward, you either have the urge to get dressed and leave, or you fall asleep."


23."I kind bored about 15 minutes in. I got all the foreplay right after hours of research, and I could tell she was having a good time. But eventually, I just kinda started thinking about how much more fun I'd have playing Horizon Zero Dawn."

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How was your first time having sex? If you feel comfortable sharing, tell me in the comments below or in this anonymous form.