Pamela Anderson wants to show her real self in HGTV show: 'I am not this cartoon character'

Pamela Anderson is settling into her Garden of Eden.

"I was really happy to spend this year just on my own with my dogs and my vegetables and the trees and the ocean," Anderson tells TODAY.com during a phone interview.

"And as lonely as it's been at times, it's a good kind of lonely and it's something that also made me stronger."

Having been away from her childhood home in Ladysmith, British Columbia for decades, the actor, model and author recently returned to Canada to renovate her grandmother's home on Vancouver Island. The makeover is chronicled in the HGTV Canada series "Pamela's Garden of Eden," streaming on Hulu in the U.S.

Now in its second season, the show tracks Anderson's step-by-step journey as she converts the waterfront home and surrounding property, as well as giving her two sons, Brandon, 27, and Dylan Lee, 25, a hand in updating their newly purchased Los Angeles home.

"What I love about (the show) is people are actually stopping me on the street and saying how much they love it, how it's just nice and lighthearted. It's authentic," she says.

The new show comes on the heels of Anderson's memoir, "Love, Pamela," which was released earlier this year along with the Netflix series "Pamela: A Love Story," a documentary co-produced by her son Brandon Lee. Both offer a revealing glimpse inside Anderson's personal history and the experiences, often traumatic, that mark her childhood, rise to fame and life in the spotlight.

In the memoir, Anderson writes that while growing up in Ladysmith, she experienced physical, emotional and sexual abuse that was "unbearable," leading her to leave home at the age of 17.

After years being away, however, Anderson says eventually the time came to return. “I went around the world and had this incredibly wild career and personal life, (but) I always knew I’d come home.”

A decision that Anderson says wasn't easy, but ultimately inspired her to reclaim herself.

"When I came home, I thought, 'I am going to rewrite my life and I'm going to start with this property. And it became like an art project. It really took my heart and soul," Anderson tells TODAY.com.

Going home again

"I think it takes a very courageous person to go back home," she says of her return to Vancouver Island, a place she once sought to escape. "I don't know if you want to call it 'the scene of the crime,' but I wanted to go back home and start from the beginning."

The fresh start hasn't come without its share of bumps, however.

"It was a really rough last four years," says Anderson of shooting the first season of "Pamela's Garden of Eden" while working on her memoir at the same time.

"I was still in a transitional period where it was very like an open wound," she says. "I feel much stronger now. I had to go through that. If you want to reclaim your life, it's not an easy process."

According to Anderson, part of that process was reconciling with her difficult past which, she says has been akin to taking “two steps forward, one step back.”

"I think how we survive in our life is we compartmentalize and it's all going to come to surface in all these different ways," she explains. "So, it's important to work through things and then you're in a better place to make better decisions."

Though it was hard at times, her work has also proven cathartic for Anderson, who says she's happier now than ever.

"And that's a sigh of relief," says the "Baywatch" actor.

Working with sons Brandon and Dylan

Anderson says her two sons were "very much a part" of her recent experience, helping her "reclaim the narrative and re-address some things."

They've also been on a renovation journey together, and she's thoroughly enjoyed that collaboration.

"It's really fun to watch them design because it's not one of those HGTV shows where there's a secret design team behind the scenes. We are actually really doing this, which is wild and crazy," she laughs.

Anderson says she brought her sons in to participate with the second season of her show, in part, to show her real life.

"I still can't seem to get people to understand, even in the industry, that I am not this cartoon character, I'm a person," she says.

The decision led to all three of them feeling that they "took our power back and are who we are" in the show.

The result?

"This is the fun part for me. I didn't realize I'd be raising kids and doing these kind of things together because they just always kind of rolled their eyes at me, like any kid does to their mom. And they kind of still do," she laughs. "I don't get away with everything, but they are really business heads, very creative."

Being 'comfortable' in her own skin and going makeup free

As for the mindset she's in now, Anderson says she's challenging herself to live beyond the shadow of other people's expectations of her, citing the headline-making decision to go makeup free during Paris Fashion Week.

"I am much more comfortable in my own skin, but I also am in an industry that really focuses on beauty. And I thought, 'I'm going to challenge beauty,'" she says of the choice.

Anderson elaborates by saying, "I think challenging ourselves is what keeps us young and beautiful. And I think, really genuinely, beauty does come from within and you don't have to play the game."

In the meantime, she's enjoying the fruits of the labor she's put into her British Columbia home these past few years.

"I feel like courage is contagious and I hope to inspire people to live joyfully without bitterness," Anderson tells TODAY.com.

For her, letting go has been nothing short of transformative.

"I'm just being like a dorky little kid out there running around in my garden. I do feel like I'm 6 years old again, just able to go to these beautiful places, wear these beautiful clothes and do these fun projects," she says.

"I feel like I've reclaimed my childlike wonder instead of just putting that all aside and trying to get through things, survive things. It's a much more of a fun place to be."

This article was originally published on TODAY.com