I Do Not Think Selena Gomez Knows What a “Social Media Break” Is

On Tuesday, Selena Gomez, the pop star, Disney alum, and Only Murders in the Building co-star, made headlines yet again for announcing a social media “break” that she would then seemingly overturn in a matter of days—or, in this case, hours. That “yet again” carries some exhaustion: This isn’t the first, or even second, time she has done this in the past year. As far as we can tell, Gomez has been announcing her deliberate absences on Al Gore’s internet since about 2016, when she did a 90-day stint in rehab to help with mental health issues stemming from her lupus diagnosis. However, since then, her respites from Instagram—her most-used social media platform, on which she is the third most-followed person in the world with nearly 430 million followers—have gotten shorter and shorter, as has the public’s patience with her.

Before 2023, Gomez’s online pauses were more substantial, though still somewhat laughable. Consider one of my personal favorites, her September 2018 announcement in which she stated her plans “to step back and live [her] life present to the moment [she’s] been given”—the wording could have used a little more workshopping—going on to call for “kindness and encouragement only for a bit!” (I guess as opposed to kindness and encouragement for a longer period.) But in the past year, these absences have comically shortened to the point where fans and haters alike are beginning to wonder if the queen of the internet break actually understands what a break even is. For the sake of science, let’s tackle the question that’s on everyone’s mind: Just how many times has Gomez announced an Instagram hiatus, simply to come crawling back to Mark Zuckerberg’s tantalizing algorithm within a singular calendar week? Of course, no one can be entirely certain of every time Gomez has commented, ’grammed, or ’tokked with her intentions to log off and “focus on what really matters,” because, frankly, she does it so often they’ve become innumerable. But here’s what we were able to compile after hours of back-breaking research.

Jan. 10, 2023: After announcing in multiple interviews and even a documentary film that she had been off social media for almost five years while her team managed her account—a move she credits for having “saved” her life—the “Come & Get It” singer returns with an Instagram post captioned “Wait, can you tell I’m back on Instagram?” Life! Who needs one, am I right?

Feb. 23, 2023: A month after her grand return, Gomez announces her plans to leave again on TikTok after getting into a public feud with her ex-boyfriend’s wife and perennial “it” girl, Hailey Bieber. According to Gomez, she is “too old for this” kind of behavior online.

Feb. 26, 2023: But not that old, as indicated by her return three days later.

Oct. 30, 2023: Gomez announces that she is taking another break due to the “violence and terror that’s going on in the world.” It is not explicitly clear what violence and where in the world she is addressing, but it is seemingly in response to the devastation in Gaza.

Nov. 9, 2023: Gomez recuperates from the violence and terror in 10 days, sharing an Instagram Story of a cookbook by Benny Blanco (remember that name) and photos from her cooking show Selena + Chef.

Dec. 8, 2023: Gomez’s fans do not welcome the news that their favorite star is dating Blanco, a music producer. After her misguided attempts to defend her boyfriend against harsh Instagram comments land her in hotter water than anyone could have imagined—somehow, Gomez ends up fumbling a response regarding Palestine while defending the dude who was last seen eating french fries off singer SZA’s bum—she announces that she is taking another break.

Dec. 9, 2023: Gomez returns within 16 hours to prove that she is the biggest Arianator (translation: fan of Ariana Grande) around.

Jan. 9, 2024: Gomez’s current drama is birthed from the rumor—fueled by a now-viral clip of Gomez in full gossip mode with Taylor Swift—that actor Timothée Chalamet, Gomez’s former co-star and (maybe?) friend, wouldn’t take a photo with her at the Golden Globes, which he attended with girlfriend Kylie Jenner, who happens to have been involved in the aforementioned Gomez versus Hailey Bieber drama. Are you still with me? After hilariously trying to dispel the hearsay by throwing some unnamed friends under the bus—and, to be fair, Chalamet himself denies that anything went down at the Globes—Gomez declares that she will be “off social media for a while” to, you guessed it, “[focus] on what really matters.”

Jan. 10, 2024: Eighteen hours after announcing that she would be taking a step back, Gomez posts a promotional photo for Selena + Chef to her Instagram Stories.

Haters might say that she broke her self-imposed exile yet again. But, as a longtime Selenator (translation: Selena Gomez fan), I still have hope that Gomez can save herself from the humiliation of being known as that kind of flip-flopping celebrity poster—after all, a promotional photo is just the type of content that a beleaguered PR rep might upload on a celebrity’s behalf. Let us all pray that Gomez has finally logged off and put her publicists to work, for a change.