Non-Rich People Who Attended Elite Schools With Rich Classmates Are Revealing Their Biggest "Culture Shocks," And I'm Speechless
We recently asked people of the BuzzFeed Community who went to schools with rich classmates to tell us what surprised them the most. Here are the unexpected results:
1."I went to an elite San Diego school. Our proms were on top of skyscrapers, parties were in mansions, etc. The biggest thing that struck me is how independent school kids in wealthy families are. Like, it’s not uncommon for a 16-year-old to go to a foreign country by themselves."
"Students were very involved and on top of their own education and sports, and there was very little parent involvement."
2."I went to a posh, all-girls private school in London, on a music scholarship. It was a super high-pressured, high-achieving environment with a big focus on going to university at Oxford or Cambridge. The quality of education was very good, including the arts, but the pressure to traditionally succeed was immense. There were a few middle-class people like me, but there was a large number of the super rich who went around with their Prada bags. There were a couple of oligarch kids and a Rothschild."
"Also, the girl who played Veruca Salt in Tim Burton's Charlie and the Chocolate Factory was a few years below me."
3."I went to a private, all-girls Catholic school with mostly very well-off families. Our school was literally a mansion converted into a school, so most classrooms had fireplaces and stunning architecture throughout. I was definitely in the lower financial echelon of students. One day, my friend and I were grabbing our backpacks from her dad's beat-up, rusty, old pickup truck when one of the wealthy girls came down to the parking lot to show off the brand-new BMW her parents just got her for her 16th birthday. I will never forget this for the rest of my days — this girl actually had the gall to snarkily say to her friends, 'I bet my mom got it discounted in Korea or something. Gross,' and then she huffed off."
"Another time, I was curious about how the school could possibly have an equestrian team when there weren't any stables or grounds for that kind of thing. The girl I asked answered, 'We keep our horses in our stables at home, of course!' Well, of course...why didn't I think of that??? 🙄 Let's just say I was not part of that clique."
4."I went to high school with a super famous musician's kid. He was a douche to everyone. He would ask girls out, then laugh and say 'just kidding.' His father was horrible, too."
—molw
5."London private school US transfer here. They’d have new Apple laptops for all middle school kids. School debit cards to be used in the cafeteria for lunch options, like sushi or truffle pasta. An endless line of black-tie chauffeurs and sports cars in the pickup lane. It was an extremely high-pressure, high-performance environment."
"Several kids in my school year were really amazing, down-to-earth people, who despite all of this, went on to have severe anxiety and depression because of expectations and being unprepared for reality when we graduated."
6."Freshman year at a Big 10 university, a girl on my dorm hall had 35 boxes shipped from NY to move into her converted triple room (which means it was supposed to be a double but squeezed in an extra person). Later that fall, for her 18th birthday, she received a white BMW with a huge pink bow, delivered and parked in front of the dorm. I thought those things just happened in commercials."
—55, Tennessee
7."I went to a performing arts college with a guy whose father owned several fancy restaurants in Chicago. At one point, he wanted to hang out with some of us on a weeknight, and I said, 'Sorry, I can't, I have to work in the morning.' (I got in on student loans, lived off-campus and had to pay rent, utilities, food, etc.) And he scoffed and told us about how he would get retail jobs 'just for fun' to see how much he could get away with before being fired."
"He also randomly decided he wanted to go to Sarah Lawrence College the next semester but ended up coming back because they actually expected him to do the work (his dad must not have had as much pull in NY). The poor guy really had no talent, but I'm sure he ended up doing just fine with daddy's money to save him."
—39, Chicago
8."The richest girl at my high school is now married to a famous white rapper whose name is two letters (not Eminem). She was really not a nice person at all, but maybe she is now, so I’m not going to name her. She had pet tigers. One of them died because it was strangled by its leash, so they had it taxidermied and kept it in their entryway. Also, she once gave attendees a $50 minimum birthday gift requirement for her birthday party."
—34, Washington
9."I went to the most expensive school in Australia, the one that King Charles went to for a while. You might expect it to be super posh, but because until recently, most wealthy Australians were farmers, that culture was still really strong. In fact, people competed over who was the poorest and most country. For example, if your parents turned up to school in a Ferrari, that was humiliating, but a 1998 Toyota Hilux with hay bales on the back tray? Now we’re talking. Looking back, it was weird."
—31, Australia
10."I went to high school in the northern suburbs of Chicago. There's also an old Time magazine article from the '90s titled 'High Times At New Trier High' about rich students from my school smoking marijuana. The mean household income for the towns that feed into my high school is about $250,000, but there are many families who rake in millions, if not more, annually. A lot of bizarre stuff went down, but one of the weirdest things is graduation..."
"We graduate in a local university's basketball stadium, with boys wearing white tuxedos and girls wearing floor-length white ball gowns. This is a PUBLIC high school, folks! But, apparently, it's also FAR too fancy to wear a standard cap and gown. Instead, we look like a thousand-person debutante ball (my graduating class was about 1,050). Because most kids' families have more money than they know what to do with, people went all out with the dress selection. The guys all rented standard white tuxes (they even did rental fittings during homeroom), but girls had to buy their own gowns. Most of my classmates got theirs at wedding dress shops (where else would you find an array of floor-length white gowns?!). At least two girls I had classes with traveled internationally to track down 'unique' dresses. I kid you not, a 17-year-old in my theater class had her parents fly her to Paris TWICE! Apparently, after she got home from the first trip, she decided she wanted a backup dress, in case anyone's dress was too similar to hers. So, back to Paris in first class for round two. She seemed surprised that any of us found the trips to be an extravagant thing."
—31, Illinois
11."A lot of the stereotypes are true! A girl in the grade above me at my private Christian high school totaled three brand-new vehicles, and her parents kept buying her brand-new vehicles. On the level of Hummer, BMW, etc. But in some instances, I had no idea they were as wealthy as they were. Like, hosting presidential candidates at their home levels, but at school in T-shirts and jeans like everyone else."
—26, Arizona
12."Well, there was one time I heard a boy screaming on his phone with his parents because they would not let him use the family private jet to fly to the beach with his friends. There was another time a girl was crying to her friends saying that her dad ruined her life, and when they asked why, she said he changed the leather of the seat of the family yacht, and now it was ugly."
—23, Brazil
13."Some girl in my freshman dorm was walking up and down the hallway one night complaining to her parents that $10K isn't enough money for her to live at college. Ten. thousand. dollars. For a three-month school quarter. That's when I knew I was a loooong way from home."
—Anonymous, 33
14."I grew up in New Jersey, in a place where there were some very wealthy families. The thing that was so striking was that they were basically alone all the time. Mom and dad were off working, or traveling, or at a spa, but they weren’t home. They would just be alone after school and often on weekends. So, yeah, they rolled up in the newest BMWs or Ranger Rovers, they had all the nicest clothes, whatever, but they were alone."
"With no supervision, they got into some wild (sometimes dangerous) stuff. I don’t know, it was just sad to see."
—32, New York
15."I went to UPenn in 1999. We drove to Philadelphia in a packed car and a large Uhaul — very large, commercial-sized because my dad didn’t make the reservation ahead of time, and he has a commercial truckers license from the 1970s he kept current. At some point during the move, my mom closes my dorm room door and asks, 'Why are all the other parents dressed up and not doing any moving? Could we have paid for you to be moved in?' My father at this point is in a tank top and sweaty. It turns out that virtually all the other kids in the hall had their help move them in first thing in the morning, so they just rolled in with a few suitcases early afternoon. Then, the twins in the room next to me, who had never done chores or anything before, had their nanny come by once a week to clean their room and bring supplies."
"Those same girls discovered cotton underwear, like Hanes multipacks were only a dollar or so a pair, so since they didn’t do laundry, they considered basic cotton underwear as disposable. When the holidays rolled around, the dorms were lined with limos with drivers picking kids up for the long weekends (freshmen were not permitted to bring cars to campus). I was looking for my dad's Mustang mixed in with limos and chauffeured Mercedes. This was all very surprising to me, and my parents are 'wealthy.' I never had student loans. I always rented a single room. My parents are lawyers and high-level executives in the top 2%, but the weird B.S. the really rich kids said and did was pretty shocking. They had no idea how to do anything and had never had jobs."
—42, New York
16."I went to grad school in NYC with a lot of rich people. One of them didn’t even know what student loans were; I believe his exact words were, 'You mean you don’t just pay tuition up front?' The crazy part is he wasn’t snobby about it — he just grew up in such an insanely rich life and truly had no awareness that people didn't live like him."
—28, New York
And finally...
17."My family isn't 'poor'; we make enough to comfortably get by with five of us. When my brothers and I went to high school, we went to school with the rich, rich, rich. The most shocking thing I ever heard was, 'F*** this! My dad is worth $500M! I don't need to listen to you! I'm just waiting for my inheritance!' and he stormed out of class never to be seen again. The student parking lot had Corvettes, Mustangs, Chargers, Escalades, you name it. These are rich kids who have a flailing grip on reality."
"My mom teaches for IPS (Indianapolis Public Schools), and our schools were worlds apart. We had computers; they didn't even have AC. We were sent home with homework that required the internet; her students didn't even have the internet at home. I could go on and on and on about the different worlds just 10 miles apart. This area has become even more affluent since I was in high school. Stay humble, and donate to your local library and school system!"
—Anonymous, Indiana
Have you gone to an elite school with wealthy classmates? Tell us about your experience in the comments below. Or, if you prefer to remain anonymous, you can share your response using this Google form.
Note: Some responses have been edited for length and/or clarity.
