In a recent interview with Zane Lowe on Apple Music, Noah talked about her past struggle with Xanax addiction, and how it affected her mental health.
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Noah explained that she decided to "kick" her addiction to "downers, prescription pills, [and] painkillers" in December of 2020.
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"Xanax — that was kind of my drug of choice," she said, "and I was completely wrapped inside of that drug."
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Noah said that she finally "asked for help" after feeling like she "just lost all hope and faith." "For so long I had been denying, denying, denying and pushing away," she explained, "where I finally just said, 'I cannot lie to you anymore.'"
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"I called my therapist, I called my psychiatrist, and I think there was a lot of confusion that a lot of things clicked for them, where a lot of stories hadn't made sense in the past."
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"I got the help that I needed and also that I deserve, and that every person with addiction or mental health deserves."
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Noah also opened up about the "personal things" she had to "come to terms with" after getting help dealing with her addiction.
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"I've acknowledged it and I'm definitely healing it," she said. "But I think also, at the time, I did not want to be alive anymore. I didn't."
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"And I was just waiting for one day that maybe I just wouldn't wake up. I don't know where it was heading. There were a lot of scary moments."
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"I just know that I was trying to avoid being alive or maybe feeling the feeling of being alive. Because sometimes being alive is painful."
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Noah also talked about how taking care of her dogs helps with her mental health, and how she's feeling in recovery.
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"Either it's the first time or the first time in, like, a very freaking long time," she said, "that I have felt this feeling in myself of just peaceful happiness."
The National Alliance on Mental Illness helpline is 1-888-950-6264 (NAMI) and provides information and referral services; GoodTherapy.org is an association of mental health professionals from more than 25 countries who support efforts to reduce harm in therapy.
If you or someone you know is struggling with substance abuse, you can call SAMHSA’s National Helpline at 1-800-662-HELP (4357) and find more resources here.
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