Neighbors who say 'relationships matter more than politics' stir up drama on Facebook

Two neighbors who tried to exemplify their tolerance of others’ political opinions in a viral posting on Facebook are being criticized for expressing their “privilege.” (Photo: Facebook/Richard White)
Two neighbors who tried to exemplify their tolerance of others’ political opinions in a viral posting on Facebook are being criticized for expressing their “privilege.” (Photo: Facebook/Richard White)

Two Texas neighbors who tried to spread a message of political civility are being shredded on Facebook for displaying their “privilege.”

Richard White of Dallas posted an Oct. 21 Facebook photo of a man and a woman holding opposing signs, one in support of the newly elected Republican Sen. Ted Cruz and the other in support of his former challenger, Democrat Beto O’Rourke.

“This Longhorn fan prefers Ted Cruz. This Aggie fan prefers Beto. We may not agree on political candidates, but we definitely agree that relationships matter more than politics,” wrote White. “Our families play games together, break bread together, drink wine together, float rivers together, and love a great party with other friends and neighbors. We treat each other with respect, disagree agreeably (and often with humor), and try, although not always successfully, to show our kids how responsible adults who don’t agree on everything should act. Be civil. Have conversations with people who don’t think like you. If everyone thought the same, it would be boring anyway. And love your neighbor.”

This Longhorn fan prefers Ted Cruz. This Aggie fan prefers Beto. We may not agree on political candidates, but we…

Posted by Richard White on Sunday, October 21, 2018

The photo was shared 24K times. Many people appreciated its message of tolerance and respectful disagreement, but others disliked what they thought of as a tone-deaf display of privilege.

“If you can truly ‘agree to disagree’ because at the end of the day it doesn’t matter? Then you live with an enormous amount of privilege,” wrote Oregon author Stephanie Tait, whose Facebook response to White’s post was shared almost 12,000 times. “It’s no coincidence that both of the people in this photo are white and appear to live in a nice middle/upper-class suburban neighborhood.”

“Could you just laugh and agree to disagree with someone who believes you should be deported?” she wrote. “With someone who believes your access to health care should be completely taken away to make their’s cheaper? With someone who believes your employer should have the right to fire you because they disagree with your religious beliefs? With someone who believes you should be denied the right to adopt your foster child because you’re single or in a same-sex marriage? If you’re able to ‘agree to disagree’ like it’s all no big deal, if you can ignore political coverage to ‘focus on real life,’ or if you can stop thinking about politics once election season is over? Then respectfully, you either aren’t aware the enormous amount of privilege you enjoy or worse yet you are aware and have chosen to isolate yourself from the realities of those who aren’t as lucky because it simply isn’t your problem.”

White and Tait did not respond to Yahoo Lifestyle’s request for comment.

Conservatives and liberals often have similar traits, but just express them differently. A 2016 study published in the journal Social Psychology of Political Polarization found that supporters of both parties feel empathy toward those less fortunate than they are. As reported by Business Insider, the study found that conservatives tend to express this empathy toward members of their family, while liberals extend the feeling to the population at large.

And a 2017 study conducted at Yale University found that a desire to feel safe motivated people’s political ideas. In experiments, conservatives who felt physically safe from harm tended to express more liberal social attitudes.

As for personal friendships, July 2017 research from the Pew Research Center found that 19 percent of people surveyed said learning that a friend supported President Trump would be problematic for them, as opposed to the 7 percent of people who reported that they would have an issue with friends who voted for Hillary Clinton.

On a more optimistic note, Pew found that 56 percent of Republicans and 59 percent of Democrats reported that they believed that people in the opposing political party held “many of my other values and goals.”

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