Nanny Shares Examples of Texts with Families Over Pay Discrepancies: 'My Jaw Dropped' (Exclusive)

The 22-year-old shared a series of "simulated" texts to TikTok in a now-viral video explaining the do's and dont's of discussing a paycheck

<p>Jamie Grill/Getty</p> Stock image of a babysitter receiving payment

Jamie Grill/Getty

Stock image of a babysitter receiving payment

One nanny in South Carolina is using her platform to help others who might be facing what she calls “mistreatment” in the industry.

In a video that has received over 980,000 views and more than 900 comments, Sophia Pagliuca shared a series of “simulated” text exchanges between her and some of the families she has worked for over the last six years as a nanny.

She titled the video “Nannying Text Template!” and starts off by explaining how she used to go about discussing money with parents when she was just starting off. The first text shows Pagliuca reaching out to parents after realizing her paycheck was smaller than expected.

“I’m SO sorry and might be totally wrong, so please let me know if I’m incorrect, but I don’t think you paid me for all my hours. It’s totally, totally fine and I could be completely wrong!! So sorry!!!” the text reads.

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“This is how I texted in the PAST when I was fresh in the industry & thought people would be mad at me!!” she writes in text overlaid onto the screenshot. “Like, why would people be upset with me for asking for MY money? I promise it’s not that deep.”

She then goes on to explain how her tactics have changed and rather than apologize, she simply restates the hours worked and asks if the family is aligned.

A good response to a follow up like this, she explains, is the family quickly rectifying the situation and paying the missing sum. A bad response, on the other hand, can look a little different.

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“Oh. Usually our other sitter gives us a discount if we use her for 12 hours since we’re giving you so many hours. [You] don’t do discounts??” an example text from another family reads.

Pagliuca then shows her response, which included an apology for any misunderstanding which she explains in text overlay that she only did because she “was anticipating she wouldn’t pay me because she came off aggressively and there’s no benefit being rude or burning bridges.”

“My jaw dropped,” she writes as she introduces how the family responded to her explaining that she does not in fact offer any “discounts.”

“Okay, I’ll have my husband Venmo you the $60… Don’t want to go back and forth over just $60! No big deal,” the text reads. “Just wondering - did you see the laundry baskets that were full and clean? If you were expecting full pay, is there a reason u didn’t give full effort during the day? You had 1hr break for nap…”

<p>Courtesy of Sophia Pagliuca</p> Sophia Pagliuca

Courtesy of Sophia Pagliuca

Sophia Pagliuca

Pagliuca explained to the family that given that it was her first time working with them she is "not normally comfortable doing people's laundry” and that while one of the children napped, she was playing outside with the others. The parent seemed to double down and expressed “disappointment” and that next time they’d give Pagliuca  “a few extra things for you to do to even it out.”

Pagliuca said she “never went back” to work with this family.

The 22-year-old tells PEOPLE that she decided to share the informational video after “receiving multiple messages a day of nannies being blatantly taken advantage of.”

“I knew people would not only be able to relate to the texts but I was hopeful it would help others in the industry feel less alone when facing mistreatment!” she adds.

In terms of the response to her video, Pagliuca says she received some pushback as “there are people upset I'm advocating for nannies to be paid a living wage because it means they can no longer get away with paying their nanny minimum wage — or even below.”

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She continues, “It genuinely baffles me why anyone would want to pay the person caring for their child $2/hr!”

Though after six years caring for children as a nanny, Pagliuca says her favorite thing about the job continues to be “the kids!” These days she works for one family full-time and has between eight and 10 other families "on rotation for weekend, overnight, and travel babysitting," she tells PEOPLE.

“The industry is so special because as a nanny you are allowed the privilege of stepping into other people's lives and going alongside parents to help them raise their children,” she says. “It comes with massive responsibility but also is such an incredible honor to be valued and trusted with the most important thing in the life of a parent. Being able to assist in the growth, development and nurturing of children is an unparalleled opportunity and I'm so thankful for all the families who have given me that privilege over the years!”

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