These New Mozzarella-Stuffed Takis Are Exactly What We Need Right Now

Any nutritionist out there will tell you that there’s a difference between (whole) foods and food products. While a time traveler from 1900 would instantly recognize “normal” foods as something they can eat, food products describe the sort of processed snacks that seem to have no natural analogue. Chief among them would be things like Totino’s Pizza Rolls and Takis, those spicy, rolled-up corn tortilla chips. Great to indulge in, but maybe not great for you.

All that is to say that these new Totino’s Takis Fuego Mini Snack Bites probably don’t count as anything remotely approaching a real, normal food. But damn do they look intriguing.

Set to sell in the frozen food section in big ol’ bags of 60 pieces, these things essentially replace the exterior of a pizza roll with the spicy hot chili pepper and zesty lime seasoned taste of a Taki, stuffing the inside with mozzarella cheese. Why put mozzarella cheese inside of a Taki? Well, why not?

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This looks like the kind of snack tailor made for people who live in states with legalized recreational marijuana, mainly because this unhealthy snack is just as mind-blowing as it is completely illogical. I mean, why not opt for a cheese that’s a closer fit to the lemon and pepper flavor profile? It feels like there’s not a ton of thought that went into this snack, but that only makes me even more eager to try it.

Regardless of your thoughts on fusing a cheese known for its role in pizza with a spicy corn tortilla chip, you can grab a bag of these from the freezer section of most major retailers. Hopefully this inspires some kind of awful Swiss-cheese stuffed Dorito roll because at this point in 2020 there are no rules anymore and we might as well just get really weird with it.