More Black Americans Are Raising Their Families Abroad—Here’s Why

There are a growing number of Black "Americans abroad" social media accounts that compare and contrast raising kids outside of the U.S.

It’s hard to miss the growing social media movement of Americans embarking on expat journeys. Hashtags such as #expatlife, #moveabroad, and #digitalnomad are flooded by American content creators, keen to share their experiences as they carve out a different life for themselves on their terms.

According to the State Department, around 9 million U.S. citizens live abroad. A poll by Gallup revealed that a further 15% want to leave the U.S. permanently. From freelance workers to families and retirees, it feels like everyone is looking to up sticks. Given the potential for further political tension during the next presidential election cycle, excessive healthcare costs, and an absence of social safety nets, some consider the U.S. to be unlivable and long for a better quality of life.

Furthermore, raising children can feel terrifying for parents concerned about gun violence. A report by Pew Research found that gun deaths among American children and teens increased by 50% in two years. Another report found that firearms contributed to the deaths of more children in the U.S. than any other type of injury or illness.

For Black Americans, the issues are even more complex. The prevalence of systemic racism and the persistence of anti-Black hate crimes are alarming and breed deep frustration among the community. Many are now planning their exit strategy (sometimes referred to as “Blaxit”), and heading to various destinations abroad in search of equality.

Kindred spoke to six families about why they chose to raise their Black children outside of the U.S. and what life looks like for them now.

Peace of Mind

In 2021, Heather Courtney left the U.S. with her then-13-year-old daughter. The first place they landed was Merida, Mexico.

“We left for several reasons. One of the reasons was for my health. America was draining and so was my mental health. I noticed that when we traveled my health issues were not as intense and my mental health was elevated. For my daughter, I saw how connected she was to other cultures and wanting to learn and experience more of life abroad.”

She says that the move did more for them than they expected–it actually improved their relationship. They ended up backpacking through Southeast Asia for three months and enjoyed it so much that they decided they wanted to live abroad full-time.

Her daughter is now 16 and they have chosen to settle in Lisbon, Portugal.

“Life in Portugal has so many amazing benefits,” Courtney says. “Number one would be safety. I don’t have to worry about my daughter coming home when it's dark out or her taking a cab. I don’t have the stress of wondering if she will make it home or if there is going to be a shooting at her school. We have the quality of life we longed for and a peace of mind.”

Quality time together

“Our daughter Olivia is 13 (she was seven when we moved abroad). Our family dreamed of living in Paris so we made the move five years ago in 2018,” explains Elizabeth Hall.

Hall and her husband were hoping to live abroad for one year so their daughter would be immersed in the French language. She had already attended a private French school in Los Angeles, so they figured the adjustment would be smooth. After a few months, they loved living in Paris and decided to make their long-term stay permanent.

“Living abroad has been wonderful despite a few challenges. We take advantage of the eight weeks of school breaks our daughter has to travel easily throughout Europe. We’ve been to 22 countries in five years,” Hall remarks. “Traveling is a big part of our family dynamic so the accessibility to travel by train and explore the world with our daughter has been tremendous.”

She also mentions that her family no longer has a daily commute, so they get to spend more quality time together. Most important, she says, is the safety aspect. “We feel relieved we don't have to worry about the safety of our daughter when she goes to school here. The schools take security very seriously and the level of gun violence is not at all comparable to the U.S.”

Exposure to New Cultures and Countries

Sherry Pedersen has been living outside of the U.S. for 10 years. She has three children, aged four, seven and nine. Her eldest was born in the U.S. and they moved abroad shortly after when he was just four months old.

“We actually have never raised kids in the U.S. but we’ve been back in the U.S. for eight months (which is the longest time we’ve been in the U.S. with our kids) as we prepare to move to our next destination,” she says. “I would say we have seen astronomical differences in raising our kids here compared to a place like Hong Kong.”

She explains that while safety was not the reason why they moved abroad (they initially moved for a job opportunity), it became the reason they stayed. “At the end of my one-year contract (around 2015), we continued to stay. My husband being a Black American man put it really simply—when we’re out late at night coming back from a bar, a club, or whatnot, I don’t see anyone holding their purse or clutching onto something because they’re afraid of me. There’s an overall sense of safety.”

Pedersen also leans into the cultures her family has learned about. “Language and culture exposure is really great,” she says. “In Hong Kong, the kids will go to a basketball game in Thailand or a volleyball tournament in Japan or Korea, so it’s wild to think about it from the perspective of an American. A lot of these schools have such great opportunities. And even in a local public school, you’ll have opportunities to go and travel on field trips, not only exploring Hong Kong but also as they get older they’ll go to different countries.”

She briefly mentions another positive difference–access to affordable nannies. “We have two nannies and they grew up taking care of our kids with us, taking them to wet markets and botanical gardens, and they treat them like their own. So we have access to an affordable system of nannies which has been a different experience to the U.S.”

Strong Community

Meghana Kamdar moved from the San Francisco Bay Area to Lisbon, Portugal, with her husband and three kids in January 2020.

“Living in Lisbon as a family of five for the last three years has really opened us to a new way of living (and being) that is all about slowing down, and being present. We walk more and engage with the community in previously unimaginable ways,” she says. “This in turn has allowed us all to feel more relaxed and stress-free compared to in our California life. Not to mention all the weekend and holiday travels in Europe that we are enjoying often.”

She firmly believes that the best form of education is through lived experiences. She was interested in giving her children a truly international upbringing, beyond traditional schooling, the classroom, and books. “To learn a language and culture through full immersion–this is true education and learning by living and experiencing the world around. In the three years plus since our move to Portugal, my children are now fluent in Portuguese and are thinking of learning a third language.”

A big aspect of choosing Portugal was also the relaxed, family-focused culture. “I craved a culture/ environment that supports families, both children and parents; a society that is more balanced between family and working life. Portugal has this unique quality about it. Children and their ways are welcomed on the streets, at stores, in restaurants; even when they have tantrums in public,” Kamdar explains.

“I don’t feel judged as a parent for my children’s behaviors and tendencies. It’s a normal part of childhood.”

A Slower Pace of Life

Joy Glenn’s family has been living in Southern Spain for five years. They jumped at the opportunity to leave the U.S. when her husband received a job offer.

“Our oldest son is 13 years old, our second son is nine years old and our daughter is seven years old. Life in Spain has personally been amazing for us! The pace of life is much slower and more relaxed here in Spain. Each country has its special qualities. We came to Spain, culturally integrated well, and fell in love,” Glenn says.

“There’s a saying here in Spain; that Spaniards “work to live” vs. the United States mentality of “live to work”. In other words; work and ambitions are not more important than quality time with family and friends,” she comments.

“Every single day of the week here in Spain you can see friends and family hanging out together. The overall quality of life just feels more carefree, and peaceful. Not to mention safety–the crime rate is extremely low and it’s very safe. For example, our kids can go to the park alone with no worries–they couldn’t do that in the U.S.”

Similarly, Ekiuwa Evbuomwan says that stepping back from the hustle culture in the U.S. played a major part in their move abroad.

“Our family moved to Colombia in May 2023. We wanted and deeply desired a change of pace. Something that allowed us to slow down, hear ourselves, hear our children, spend more time as partners and with our children. Back in the States, we worked a ton, and our uninspired routine became the focal point of our lives,” Evbuomwan says.

“Life in Colombia is beautiful. Some days are hard, but as we look back on the last four months, we can see, hear, and feel more. Our little family of four has grown closer, our littles are trying new foods, and we do more activities as a family.”

She says that her children—who are six and four years old–are now learning the language. “It’s beautiful. We are thankful.”

“We have a woman that cooks all of our meals for us five days a week. She also does all the cleaning. It’s a complete blessing. That alone has freed up more time for our family to connect. In the States, it was a shared task that oftentimes left us frustrated, tired, overwhelmed and so much more. We now have a clear vision for what’s important. We plan to eventually return to the U.S., we just needed a moment, or rather a year to stop, readjust, and think about what means the most to us all and that’s our little family.”

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