This Mom Told Her 11-Year-Old Daughter That She's "Too Old To Cuddle," And It's Starting Conversations About The Importance Of Parental Affection

There is a section on Reddit called "Am I the Asshole?" which is where people second-guess how they've handled certain situations and ask users their opinion on whether or not they were — you guessed it — assholes.

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So, today's dilemma comes from Reddit user u/Abject_Ad_4249, who is 37 years old. She and her 38-year-old husband have an 11-year-old daughter who "is very small for her age and gets treated like a younger child sometimes."

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In the thread, u/Abject_Ad_4249 explains how her daughter loves to hop on her and her husband's lap and cuddle but that she has been feeling like her daughter is too old for that.

So, when her daughter recently tried to hop in her lap and cuddle, she told her to get off. "She got really upset, got off me, went to her room, and slammed the door. She hasn't tried to get in my lap since then and things are tense between us. She doesn't talk to me unless she has to and when I hugged her goodnight last night she didn't hug me back," u/Abject_Ad_4249 shared in the thread.

"I feel really guilty because I obviously hurt her feelings but I feel like she might be too old for sitting on my lap. Am I the Asshole?"

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Right away, it was apparent that people thought this was an asshole move by the mom.

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Many agreed that the mom was negatively looking at a really special situation. "She's not going to want to cuddle you much longer. You maybe have a year left. And you're throwing that time away instead of cherishing it," said u/imothro.

A lot of adults even admitted that they still cuddle their parents. "I'm turning 26 on Sunday and still cuddle my mom. Life is hard and that few minutes of cuddling makes it bearable," shared u/aceworth.

Some people shared that they still remember how they felt when their mom cut them off from affection like this as a kid. "I was told basically the same thing OP told her kid. I didn’t stop wanting or needing comfort from my mom, but it stopped me from acting on it. As an adult now with my own child, I’ll take the cuddles for as long as I can. I think it’s ridiculous to believe there’s an age cutoff," u/LionsTigersBears0HMY said.

The fact that there is no age limit for parental affection was the big takeaway. "When I'm too big for my mom's lap, I'll start holding her. My 16-year-old still curls up for snuggles," said u/leslieandco.

And, luckily, most people believed the situation was easily fixable. "Nobody is ever too old to cuddle their parents," u/spaceymarziii said, adding, "Not wanting to baby or spoil your child is normal, though, and you shouldn't be too hard on yourself. This is a very simple situation, you can easily fix it by apologizing to and hugging your daughter."

In addition, cuddling your kids* actually has science-backed social and emotional benefits, including better sleep, improved heart health, and stress reduction.

Now, we'd like to turn the convo to you — what are your thoughts on this particular situation? Let us know in the comments!