Meet Ellen Pompeo's Longtime Leading Man, Husband Chris Ivery!

The couple first met 20 years ago and now shares three children.

Ellen Pompeo might be one of the highest-paid people in television and star of TV's longest-running medical drama, but offscreen, the 53-year-old actress actually doesn’t like to create that much drama. And while her Grey's Anatomy alter ego, Meredith Grey, has been linked to a few guys throughout the show’s run, in her personal life, Pompeo has only had eyes for one fella since 2003: husband Chris Ivery.

“He’s my favorite person,” she's gushed about her real-life McDreamy. (Aww!)

Keep reading to find out more about Ellen Pompeo’s leading man and their life together.

Related: Debbie Allen Reveals the Secret to Why Grey's Anatomy Has Endured

Who is Ellen Pompeo’s husband?

Chris Ivery, 56, doesn’t work in television: He was a record producer and writer for about 25 years, even earning a co-writing credit on “Cheers (Drink to that)” by Rihanna in 2011.

However, in 2019, Ivery turned his sights on the fashion industry. A favorite clothing brand of Ivery’s, Sergio Tacchini, was hard to find in the United States; he ordered it from the UK until it occurred to him to reach out to the brand directly. He talked with them about relaunching the Sergio Tacchini label in Los Angeles, and from that, the STLA Collection was born.

The career change has impressed Pompeo, who was happy to support her hubby's new endeavor. "He's been in the music business for 25 years and he changed careers at 50. And he killed it,” his wife gushed to Us Weekly. "I mean, knocked it out of the park. It's amazing! So for anybody who feels they're stuck, you can change your career at any age."

Related: Salma Hayek's Got the 'Best Husband in the World'—Meet Fashion-Mogul François-Henri Pinault! 

How did Ellen Pompeo meet her husband?

You never know who you’ll meet at the supermarket, and Pompeo knows that better than anyone. She met Ivery in a Los Angeles grocery store in 2003, two years before Grey’s Anatomy debuted.

The pair soon realized that they’d grown up within 10 miles of each other in Boston, Massachusetts, but never crossed paths until they met up in California as adults. "We were six degrees our whole lives, so I feel like we were sort of meant to be," Pompeo said later.

At first, their relationship was a platonic one. “We were friends for six months,” Ivery once said in an interview. “Then one night she just looked different to me.”

When did Ellen Pompeo and Chris Ivery get married?

When Ivery proposed to Pompeo with a 3.5-carat diamond ring in November 2006, Pompeo said, “We’ll get married eventually, secretly.”

And she meant it. The two finally married on Nov. 9, 2007 at New York City Hall. The Big Apple's mayor at the time, Michael Bloomberg, officiated the wedding. The simplicity of the event was exactly what they wanted. "We flew out on a redeye Thursday night. Friday morning, we woke up, went to City Hall, had the wedding really quick, and then we went to Lupa for lunch after," Pompeo told Kelly Ripa and Ryan Seacrest in 2017. "We had the whole weekend and no one knew, so we had that to ourselves."

Does Ellen Pompeo have children?

Pompeo and Ivery have three children. Their eldest, Stella Luna Pompeo Ivery, was born in September 2009. To hide Pompeo’s baby bump, there was a storyline in Grey’s Anatomy Season 6 about Pompeo’s character donating her kidney. Scenes were pre-taped and Pompeo was able to hide under her TV scrubs.

Their second daughter, Sienna May, was born with the assistance of a surrogate in August 2014. Pompeo didn’t announce Sienna’s birth until about two months after the fact. Finally, baby brother Eli Christopher joined the brood in December 2016. “Chris Ivery just fell a notch, I’ve got a new guy,” she posted on Instagram, along with a pic of the proud papa holding their new baby. She also posted a black and white video of herself dancing with the little guy.

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Today, Pompeo shares pictures and videos of her kids online from time to time, including cute snaps with Stella, BizMarkie covers from Eli and quarantine advice from Sienna.

She tries to take parenting in stride, telling InStyle that “I make a lot of mistakes. Kids are just so open and honest, and you could get down on yourself a lot as a parent… But you can’t adopt a sort of victim’s attitude, you have to adopt an optimistic, can do, ‘how do I fix it?’ attitude with kids.”

One thing Pompeo is open and honest about is what it’s like to raise biracial children and how important it is to communicate with others about race. "I’m not afraid to talk about race. A lot of people get very nervous when you bring it up, and I understand why they do, but I am not afraid,” she told Jada Pinkett Smith on Red Table Talk in 2018.

Related: Mandy Moore's a Mom! But First, Get To Know Her Husband Taylor Goldsmith

What does Ellen Pompeo’s husband think about her kissing other men on screen?

Like any good husband, Ivery wants to support his wife. Early on, he watched Grey’s Anatomy with pride, but then the kissing started. "Poor guy had no idea what he was getting into,” Pompeo told Laura Brown on the podcast Ladies First with Laura Brown. "He was like, 'This is not what I signed up for. You go to work and make out with that? I like Patrick [Dempsey, who played Dr. Derek Shepherd] and everything, he's a good dude, but like really?'"

In 2019, Ivery admitted he backed off of watching the show because of all the romance. “I would say I’m not jealous,” he told Us Weekly in 2019. “I’m really confident, but it’s awkward.”

Where do Ellen Pompeo and Chris Ivery live?

The couple shares a gorgeous oceanfront Malibu beach house that they bought in 2013. The departing Grey's Anatomy actress gave Architectural Digest a tour of their home for its January 2023 cover feature.

Does Ellen Pompeo have any advice for a long-lasting marriage?

Despite fleeting rumors of infidelity, all signs indicate that Pompeo and Ivery's marriage is built for the long haul. Pompeo’s secret? “Just don’t try to change people,” the star shared in 2018. “They are who they are, and they were fine when you married them, so don’t expect them to change.”

Next, Everything We Know So Far About Grey's Anatomy Season 20!