What Is Your Love Language? Take Our Quiz
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Love language is a term that's used to describe the way that people like to express and receive love. But it's more than a buzzword—knowing your love language can help you figure out why you behave the way you do in relationships, and even why you might get annoyed when your partner doesn't do certain things for you.
The idea of love languages comes from The 5 Love Languages, which was published in 1992 by Gary Chapman, Ph.D. As Chapman details in the book, there are five main love languages and each has its own unique qualities. Here's what you need to know about love languages—and how to figure out yours.
What are the five main love languages?
According to Chapman, these are the five main love languages:
Words of affirmation
Quality time
Physical touch
Acts of service
Receiving gifts
What do the five main love languages mean?
Chapman's book spells out the differences and unique qualities of each love language. Here's a breakdown:
Words of affirmation
Words of affirmation focuses on verbal expressions of love. Meaning, you feel most loved (and express your love for others) through telling others how you feel about them. The phrase "I love you" may carry a deeper meaning for you than for people who have other love languages.
Quality time
People with this love language value time spent together. They prefer to spend a lot of time with their partner, whether it's just hanging out or doing a special date together. When they can do this, they feel the most loved.
Physical touch
People who have physical touch as their love language crave physical affection and dole it out easily. Holding hands, kissing, sex, and anything where you can touch is how you show affection and prefer to receive it.
Acts of service
This love language focuses on doing things to try to make someone else happy, even if it means you have to sacrifice something. That could include keeping your partner's favorite ice cream in the freezer, taking time off work to care for them when they're sick, or taking out the trash.
Receiving gifts
People who have this love language feel the most loved when they're given thoughtful or meaningful gifts. They also typically express their love for others by giving them personalized gifts.
How to find your love language
Not sure what your love language is? Take this quiz to find out.
It makes me feel good when my partner...
A. Tries hard to make quality time for us.
B. Sends a text to say they're thinking of me.
C. Surprises me with my favorite flowers.
D. Puts their arm around me in public.
E. Brings me flowers.
For a special occasion like an anniversary, I'll usually...
A. Plan a getaway for two.
B. Write a sweet Instagram tribute to my partner.
C. Bring my partner breakfast in bed.
D. Make a point to have great sex, with plenty of cuddles afterward.
E. Splash out on the perfect present.
What is your favorite thing your partner or a former partner has done for you?
A. Planned a special outing or vacation, just for us.
B. Written a poem, special card, or song for me.
C. Took time off work to be with me.
D. Held me all night.
E. Gave me a really special gift.
What kind of date do you prefer?
A. Anything where we can build new memories together.
B. Something where we can go someplace and just talk.
C. Volunteering together.
D. Getting a couples massage.
E. Being surprised with a thoughtful night out.
One of the biggest perks of being in a relationship is...
A. Always having someone to hang out with.
B. Hearing compliments all the time.
C. Having someone help you out in life.
D. All the cuddles and kisses.
E. Coming up with fun gifts to show you care.
ANSWERS
Mostly As: Your love language is quality time. You really appreciate those one-on-one moments with your partner and do your best to try to create special times with them.
Mostly Bs: Your love language is words of affirmation. An "I love you" goes a long way for you, and it means a lot to you to hear compliments or that your partner is thinking of you when you're not together.
Mostly Cs: Your love language is acts of service. You feel special when your partner goes out of their way to do thoughtful gestures for you, like making your coffee in the morning.
Mostly Ds: Your love language is physical touch. You can't get enough cuddles and kisses, and feel special when you and your partner make time for sex.
Mostly Es: Your love language is receiving gifts. You love it when your partner surprises you with a little something, and have a lot of fun thinking up fun ways to partner them in return.
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