Lost a loved one to homicide? This group can help
When Seandara Holmes' 20-year-old son, Tyceria Alexander, was shot and killed on the way to a job interview last year, there were few she could talk to that understood her devastation.
"You don't have anybody to talk to about different things because everybody don't know what you're going through," Holmes said. "I'm on some online things, but you know, there's nothing here in Gaston County. You have to go to Charlotte, different places like that. When you work 40 hours a week, you don't have time to go to Charlotte for a support group. So those feelings that you're feeling, you have to bury them down until you do have somebody to talk to."
Soon, though, Holmes will be able to access the kind of support she needs locally.
In May, the Gaston County District Attorney's Office is starting an in-person support group for people who have lost loved ones to homicides. The first meeting will be held at the First Baptist Church of Gastonia on May 7 from 6:30-8 p.m.
"For the life of a murder trial or a homicide case, our office supports them," District Attorney Travis Page said. "We listen to their cries and see their tears. We hug them, and we surround them with love and care. And then a verdict comes back and so many times we lose touch with them. And this is a way for us to stay connected to those folks."
He said that his hope is for the survivors to reach out and support one another.
"We'd like for this to take on a life of its own. And for the folks that are participating, and who are working through their grief, to actually be a resource for, for the next family of a homicide victim, for tomorrow's homicides," he said. "To where when there's a new homicide in Gastonia and Gaston County, maybe someone in this group reaches out to that mother or brother or son or daughter and says, 'Hey, I know you're probably not ready to talk about it now. But I'm here for you. And I've been in your shoes. And I want you to know that I care about you.'
The idea for the group has been brewing for some time, Page said.
Page's legal assistant, Daisy Yepson, has been leading the effort, and the District Attorney's office has partnered with Hope United Survivor Network to start the group.
"We actually sat with one of our moms who lost her son due to violence last year, and she sat here and cried and said, 'There is nothing in Gaston County,'" Yepson said.
"We had just been working on this that particular morning, and we looked at her and I think we kind of started crying because it was just one of those surreal things. And we said, 'Not yet, and we're working on that,'" Page added.
At each meeting, a meal will be served, Page said. In the first 30 minutes, the people there will have the opportunity to talk to law enforcement and representatives from the District Attorney's Office about the legal process.
"And then if there's specific concerns about a specific case, that detective or law enforcement officer can take that back to their department, or that Assistant DA can take it back to our office, and we can reach out to those victims or their families and address those concerns or questions that they have," Page said.
After that, those representatives will leave, and there will be a group therapy session, Page said.
Wendy Schneider Salazar, the grandmother of Liam Lagunas, who was killed in 2021 by a drag racer on U.S. 74, said that a support group like the one Page and Yepson are starting would be "tremendous" for Gaston County.
"I think it's a huge step in helping people deal with the loss of loved ones. Grief is something that people don't talk about. It's very painful, brings back a lot of sad memories, and it'll be a huge step in helping people, supporting people," she said. "There's so many people out there, they don't know where to turn. And nobody knows how to help somebody unless they're in the same shoes."
To join the support group, contact Daisy Yepson at 704-852-3163.
This article originally appeared on The Gaston Gazette: Lost a loved one to homicide? This group can help
