Lily Allen Is Done With Motherhood Platitudes: ‘They Ruined My Career’
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Lily Allen is keeping it real. Because while — just like their male counterparts — moms can and do work, they’re often handed a lot of freakin’ balls to juggle. And it’s not always feasible to keep them all in the air while also keeping sane.
“My children ruined my career,” Allen said with a laugh on the Radio Times Podcast “I love them and they complete me, but in terms of pop stardom, totally ruined it.”
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Oof — the “Smile” singer is not holding back. And maybe she shouldn’t. Because the image we have in our heads of a working mother with a Pinterest-perfect life might actually be doing a disservice to moms who are trying to do what’s best for themselves and their families. And that looks different for everyone.
“It really annoys me when people say you can have it all because,” Allen said, “quite frankly, you can’t.”
“Some people choose their career over their children, and that’s their prerogative. But my parents were quite absent when I was a kid, and I feel like that really left some nasty scars that I’m not willing to repeat on mine.”
And so she decided to “step back” and concentrate on her kids. She admitted to host Kelly-Anne Taylor and presenter Miquita Oliver that she’s glad she did that and that her kids are “pretty well-rounded” as a result.
“Fingers f*cking crossed,” she said.
Allen’s Family
Allen — who is married to Stranger Things actor David Harbour — shares tweens Ethel, 12 and Marnie, 11 with ex-husband Sam Cooper. Last year, she admitted she thinks her daughters will be mad when they find out how hard she partied at the start of her career and about her substance abuse and sex addiction.
“Ethel was seven, Marnie was six when I got clean, and there’s a lot of sh*t that happened before that they’ll be really cross about,” she said.
Back in 2018, she admitted that she was “lost” when she tried to return to the stage after the birth of her daughters.
“‘[I thought] ‘Who am I? What is all this? What are these songs? Why am I nowhere near my children?’ … I lost my sense of self,” she said. “I lost my identity. I was being a bad mum. I was being bad at my job. I’d wake up on a tour bus in the middle of Wisconsin and be so hungover. I cheated on my husband. All I wanted to do was be with my kids.”
The “Not Fair” has also spoken out about another experience that left her a “changed person.” In 2016, she opened up to The Guardian about her infamous and horrifying experience of being stalked that culminated in a man allegedly breaking into her home while she and her children were asleep, calling her a “f*cking b*tch,” and supposedly carrying a knife.
“There was this second outside my kids’ room when I was terrified to go in, in case of what I might find,” she said.
She thankfully found her daughters safe and sound, and while they may have “ruined” her career, we have to imagine they’ve also helped mend her heart.
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