The Least Sexy Prime Day Deals Will Actually Save You a Ton of Money on Things You Need The Most — Here’s What to Shop
You know that saying about a shiny new toy being distracting to what really matters? I don’t remember it entirely, nor do I have the will to research it, but the gist is to not let things that seem great distract you from the things that are truly incredible. So is the case for Prime Day shopping. I know that there seems to be so many incredible skincare, fashion or beauty sales going on right now, but in reality, those 20 percent markdowns happen, like, every week. Trust me, I write about them. The real Prime Day savings come from shopping items that are, to be blunt, not sexy at all. I’m talking toilet paper, laundry detergent, tooth brushes, you get the gist.
I know it’s not the most fun to stock up on the necessities, but there’s a recession looming, people! You have to save now while you can! So, here’s the game plan: Prime Day is ending tonight and I’m sure you all have gotten your “fun” shopping out of the way. Now’s the time to get serious and grab things you actually truly need. Just remember that Prime Day deals are only available to Prime members. No worries if you don’t have a subscription, you can get a completely free trial and all of the benefits today at this page here. It’s that easy!
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Sure, it’s basically glorified grocery shopping, but stocking up on these home essentials during the last hours of Prime Day will save you a bunch of money down the road. Whether you’re a protein junky like my boyfriend who may or may not have gotten 15 boxes of Quest bars (if anybody has a storage unit they’re not using, let me know) or if you’re a clean freak like me who absolutely adores their Sunday clean-sprees, there will be some incredible deals for you.
Below, check out the best unsexy Prime Day deals you can still shop that will actually save you money. You need these things a hell of a lot more than you need that gua sha, no matter what TikTok is telling you.
Charmin Ultra Gentle Toilet Paper
Starting off strong here because I didn’t come to play. Everybody poops. Everybody needs toilet paper. Charmin’s doesn’t feel like sandpaper and it’s 43 percent off. Grab a bunch, grab a little, I don’t care. Just know if you don’t hop on this deal, you’ll regret it when you see the cost of TP at the grocery store.
Charmin Ultra Gentle Toilet Paper $19 (originally $32)
Purell 2-in-1 Moisturizing Advanced Hand Sanitizer Gel
The pandemic has taught me one thing and it’s that Purell hand sanitizer is like a black market hot ticket. They always sell out and whenever your whip out a bottle in public, at least eight people will ask for some. Stock up on a six-pack and save $12.
Purell 2-in-1 Moisturizing Advanced… $18 (originally $30)
Mr. Clean Magic Eraser Variety Pack
I have one king and his name is Mr. Clean. I don’t know what they put in these erasers but they have saved my life and my apartment deposit so many times, I think I owe the brand a kidney. This discounted six-pack comes with erasers for your bath, kitchen and “extra durable” clean-ups. Unsure what that means, but I’m going to buy it and probably lose track of which is for what and use them on any and all surfaces. I don’t recommend this, but live your life and I’ll live mine.
Mr. Clean Magic Eraser Variety Pack $11 (originally $18)
Crest 3D White Professional Effects Whitestrips
Crest whitening strips have been in my life longer than any intimate relationship. They’re usually costly but we all know how to make them last. Get them for 35 percent off today and you’ll be set for the next year. Apparently, this kit includes 20 daily treatments that can remove stains from the past 14 years (!!) of your life. Imagine removing emotional stains like that! Nobody would need therapy!
Crest 3D White Professional Effects… 30 (originally $46)
Vital Proteins Collagen Peptides Powder
Do you know how much collagen your body starts to lose after you turn 30??? One whole percent a year. Hell to the no. My body will be full of collagen from now on because I’m buying the same protein powder that Jennifer Aniston has been putting in her coffee (no comment) for decades. She looks great, I’ll look great. It’s simply science. It’s also nearly 50 percent off.
Vital Proteins Collagen Peptides Powder $27.99
Philips Sonicare ProtectiveClean 5300 Rechargeable Electric Power Toothbrush
I forget how often we’re supposed to replace our toothbrushes, but chances are it’s well past the time for you and me. It’s time for all of us to grow up and get the electric one we know is better for us so that we don’t get droopy gums and so our dentists collectively stop nagging us. No offense, dentists, it just hurts our feelings, ok? You’ll save the most on this Philips version that’s 40 percent off and now $60. Sexy? No. But clean teeth are.
Philips Sonicare Electric Toothbrush $60 (originally $100)
Green Mountain Coffee Roasters Breakfast Blend
Every time I have to buy a new pack of K-Cups, my soul dies a little. At least with this 48-pack, I’ll get a month’s worth of pods for 41 percent off. Also, I’m a sucker for a good breakfast blend and this one is one of my favorites. Seriously, I’ve tried some that taste like dirt water and this one actually tastes like a nice cup of coffee.
Green Mountain Coffee Roasters… $18 (originally $32)
Quest Nutrition Mini Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough Protein Bars
Protein bars will never, ever taste as good as dessert, but these ones are good. They don’t taste like feet and have a bunch of protein in them. The mini kinds are cute and are ideal to pack in your bag for road trips or commutes to work. They’ll keep you from going hangry, and you’ll save 20 percent on them. Quest doesn’t go on sale at all, so take what discount you can.
Quest Nutrition Mini Chocolate Chip… $16 (originally $20)
Kate Blanc Cosmetics Castor Oil 11-pc Set
Castor oil is not sexy, but shoppers use this on their eyebrows and swear it helps their hair grow back in a few weeks, and that’s hot. Included in this on-sale 11-piece set is a huge 4-ounce bottle of castor oil, five spoolies and five applicator brushes.
Kate Blanc Cosmetics Castor Oil 11-pc… 11.95 (originally $24.99)
Rubbermaid 5-Piece Brilliance Food Storage Containers
There’s nothing cute about packing a lunch for work and whipping out a stained food container. I really don’t know what it is about pasta sauce, but it sticks like gum to hair. These Rubbermaid ones are a major upgrade from those grimy plastic things you’ve had for years. Plus, they come with two sections so you don’t have to mix wet and dry food. That’s nice. Get them on sale for $27 and thank me later.
Rubbermaid 5-Piece Brilliance Food… $27 (originally $36)
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