Jonah Hill’s Leaked Texts To His Ex Suggest ‘Emotionally Abusive’ Relationship
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If you were offline between July 7 and 8, you may have missed all the talk about Jonah Hill’s texts to his ex-girlfriend that were leaked online.
Surfer Sarah Brady and Hill dated for roughly a year, making their red-carpet debut in 2021, and didn’t reveal much about their relationship on social media except for a snap here and there. In February 2022, he shut down rumors they had taken the next step to become engaged, with Hill writing in an Instagram post: “The rumors are not true,” Hill wrote before joking, “I’m engaged. But not to my girlfriend. I am engaged to your mom. I know this is shocking but please respect our privacy at this time.” Your mom jokes in 2022, really?
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If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic violence, help is available. Call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 800-799-SAFE (7233) for confidential support.
Earlier that week, he’d paid tribute to Brady in a Valentine’s Day post, saying, “Valentine Goddess,” Hill wrote in his caption. “Thank you for endless new adventures and for teaching me new lessons every day.” He added, “Thanks for the chance to grow and evolve and be better every day. ❤️” She posted something similar, writing in a post: “My Valentine 💘 thank you for loving every part of me @jonahhill.” But, as is often the case, there was apparently something far more insidious happening beneath the surface, because Brady just revealed the contents of Jonah Hill’s alleged texts to her as a “warning to all girls.” What did the texts say? Read on.
Jonah Hill’s texts
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Beginning on Friday, July 7, Sarah Brady revealed Jonah Hill’s texts that she claims were “emotionally abusive” and what many relationship experts would consider coercive control, in a series of posts shared to her Instagram story.
“This is a warning to all girls. If your partner is talking to you like this, make an exit plan. Call me if you need an ear,” Brady wrote, revealing he’d asked her to remove all Instagram posts of her showing her “ass in a thong”. She obliged, then the 21 Jump Street actor said it was a “good start” but she didn’t “seem to get” his point. “But it’s not my place to teach you. I’ve made my boundaries clear,” Hill reportedly wrote. “You refuse to let go of some of them and you’ve made that clear and I hope it makes you happy.”
In a text dated December 2, 2021, Hill allegedly wrote to her: “Plain and simple: If you need: surfing with men, boundaryless inappropriate friendships with men, to model, to post pictures of yourself in a bathing suit, to post sexual pictures, friendships with women who are in unstable places and from your wild recent past beyond getting lunch or coffee or something respectful, I am not the right partner for you. If these things bring you to a place of happiness, I support it and there are no hard feelings. These are my boundaries for romantic partnership. My boundaries with you are based on the ways these actions have hurt our trust.”
She also revealed that he told her: “You’re right we can’t do surf social things or develop trust until you consider me and make decisions that give regard to our relationship. I have been vulnerable as possible and I am telling you I am needing you to step up to the plate. Which you can. I am sure of it. But these losers don’t get your time if you want me. Straight up. It’s consideration.”
The text continued: “I respect your love of surfing but I respect myself as well. And your love of surfing and being in those situations and lack of awareness are not mutually exclusive. This isn’t me. I have my own issues that I own. If you want marriage and family you can’t use the 25 card. Step up and cut shit. These people don’t get your time or your kindness at the sacrifice of mine.” As a postscript in the Insta story, she added that “by ‘these people’ he meant any friend of mine that he hadn’t personally approved of.”
Another text exchange read: “Respect however you want to live your life you only get one. Sort of done explaining with explaining myself.” She replied: “3 removed, not the video yet, it is my best surfing video. Would you feel better if the cover frame was different? Any more specific ones that bother you?”
He responded: “Yes one that isn’t your ass in a thong.”
Another detailed how he said: “Oh and modeling which is the last professional I would be with as a partner. But LOL must be hard feeling so trapped.”
She replied: “Well maybe you should’ve asked me more about what I do for work before you decide to date me then. A little late now.” He responded: “Keep taking me for granted,” adding sarcastically: “Go model! It’s a fulfilling life you’ll love it. Real depth and substance and sustainability for relationships. But actually I’m done with this convo.”
Hill’s struggles with mental health, particularly anxiety, have been well-documented and his therapy sessions with leading psychiatrist Phil Stutz actually served as the basis for the documentary film Stutz.
“Through this journey of self-discovery within the film, I have come to the understanding that I have spent nearly 20 years experiencing anxiety attacks, which are exacerbated by media appearances and public-facing events,” Hill wrote in an open letter, which was initially published by Deadline at the time of release. “You won’t see me out there promoting this film, or any of my upcoming films, while I take this important step to protect myself,” the Wolf of Wall Street actor explained in his letter. “If I made myself sicker by going out there and promoting it, I wouldn’t be acting true to myself or to the film.”
But as Brady noted in her series of Instagram posts, mental health issues are no excuse for how he allegedly treated her. “I too struggle with mental health, but I do not use it to control [people] like he did to me.” She added, “It’s been a year of healing and growth with the help of loved ones and doctors to get back to living my life without guilt, shame and self-judgment for things as small as surfing in a swimsuit rather than a more conservative wetsuit. And I’m sure there’s still much more healing from this abuse ahead of me.”
Understandably, the contents of the texts sparked outrage among women online. One person tweeted: “I’ve seen folks tweet that if Jonah Hill wanted a gf who didn’t post bathing suit pictures or have guy friends he shouldn’t have dated a surfer. But here’s the thing: Emotionally abusive & controlling men don’t want ‘submissive’ women, they want to take strong women down a peg.” Another wrote: “Jonah Hill is a great example of that old saying, give a man some therapy, and you heal him for a day; teach a man therapy words and you feed his manipulation for a lifetime.”
Indeed, sex and relationships expert Georgia Grace observed in an Instagram post that “Controlling behaviour is not a boundary • Using language from therapy to intimidate or manipulate your partner is never okay. Jonah Hill’s text thread has everyone talking – where frameworks from therapy (i.e. setting ‘boundaries’) were used to justify abusive and dangerous behaviour.” In the post, she pointed out the difference between controlling behavior and healthy boundaries, actions imposed on others regarding what they can and can’t do is controlling behavior, versus actions or limits we’re willing to take or set to keep ourselves safe and healthy is healthy boundary setting.
In one of her final posts, Brady made mention of Hill’s girlfriend, Olivia Millar, with whom he secretly welcomed his first child earlier in 2023. “I hope my ex has a daughter,” Brady wrote, alongside a white heart emoji. “Maybe she’ll turn him into a real feminist,” she continued, “because the fact that he calls himself a feminist now is laughable.” In another post, Brady wrote of Hill, “If I could have one wish for him it would be that he is surrounded by feminist men who can hold him accountable to grow in the ways he has expressed he wants to.”
Since leaking the first round of texts, Brady has released more, revealing that the reason she held off on whistleblowing was because she didn’t want the added stress to impact Hill’s then-pregnant girlfriend (and rumored fiance). These texts suggest she and Hill were in close contact for at least six months after their breakup. “He kept me on as a close emotional confidant after the break up was, Sexting me on July 13 2022, visited me at my apartment in my hometown early August 2022, and then waited till a week after I moved to Hawaii for law school to send me a text being like btw I’m in a new relationship,” she revealed.
In an alleged exchange from less than a year ago, Hill can be seen asking if Brady is around for a catch-up. A text that is dated Aug. 30, 2022 then reads: “I know I don’t need to but in the spirit of pure respect to our friendship and appreciation for each other I did want to be transparent that I did start dating someone recently. I’m sorry if that is painful it just happened and I didn’t want to not be transparent with you ever as I care about you.”
Later that same day, Brady shared with him a paparazzi photo of him kissing a brunette on a beach — with the captions mistakenly identifying Olivia as Sarah. She said alongside the picture: “Impressive turnaround time btw” before asking Hill to ask his publicist to issue a correction to the tabloids. Brady then wrote: “Not that it’s really my business but out of my own personal chicks before dicks code if that’s headed anywhere other than hookup or fling I’d appreciate if you make that woman aware of how recently you’ve been flirting with me, sexting me, and leaning on me for partner level emotional support.”
He replied: “I’m sorry WHAT. I have been there for YOU as a friend which I have made very clear. And not only is it not your business, as I only mentioned it to you out of respect and friendship, but I have not been flirting with you or sexting you in any way where it would be inappropriate at this time to start dating someone. And if anything I have felt for your change and tried to be a good and supportive friend. And to be crystal clear I have not flirted or sexted with you in any way shape or form in months.”
When Brady screenshot an NFSW text to send back to him, he replied: “Screenshotting intimate texts between us is a huge triggering violation for me and breach of trust as a friend as I have explained to you about breaches of trust I have had between trusted friends recently that have caused me trauma. I am incredibly hurt and feel a lack of safety where I have always trusted you.”
He continued: “I’m sorry if a former partner moving on is painful and I empathize with that. But I have done nothing wrong and if I wasn’t a public person I wouldn’t face this kind of violation and having shared that with you and then watching you be like this today shatters my ability to trust any body even further. I have always shown you kindness and support.”
If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic violence, help is available. Call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 800-799-SAFE (7233) for confidential support.
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