Jennifer Lopez Got Candid About Her First Split With Ben Affleck In 2004, And It's Honestly Really Sad

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Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck have found their happy ending — but the journey getting there was not easy.

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After dating in the early 2000s and getting engaged, the pair went their separate ways in 2004.

A close-up of Ben and Jennifer in the early 2000s
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It took almost two decades, but Jennifer and Ben found their way back to each other and tied the knot earlier this year.

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Looking back on their first split, Jennifer admits it was one of the most painful times of her life and affected her career for the next 18 years.

A close-up of Ben and Jennifer in the early 2000s
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"It was so painful after we broke up," she said during a conversation with Zane Lowe for Apple Music 1.

She continued, "Once we called off that wedding 20 years ago, it was the biggest heartbreak of my life, and I honestly felt like I was going to die."

A close-up of Ben and Jennifer in the early 2000s
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Jennifer explained that following the split, she felt as though she couldn't make music the way she used to, and it set her on a "spiral" for years.

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"So I didn’t make music in that way that I did in 2002 until now … it set me on a spiral for the next 18 years where I just couldn’t get it right," Jennifer shared.

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She added, "But now, 20 years later, it does have a happy ending. It has the most would-never-happen-in-Hollywood ending."

A close-up of Ben and Jennifer embracing
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After rekindling her romance with Ben, she says, she "felt so inspired and so overtaken with emotion that [the music] was just pouring out of me."

A close-up of Ben and Jennifer looking at each other
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As for her new album, This Is Me...Now, Jennifer says it will cover her journey to finding love again — and hopefully inspire others not to give up.

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"I think what the message of [This Is Me...Now] is — if you have, like me at times, lost hope, almost given up, don't," Jennifer said.

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She added, "True love does exist, and some things do last forever, and that's real. I want to put that message out into the world, and that does take a lot of vulnerability."

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You can hear all that Jennifer had to say below: