"I haven't really taken a moment to process all this. I just wanted to write a message here for soon to be moms. I know I said I wouldn't dedicated my instagram to my pregnancy/mom content, but getting these words across is super important to me," she began in a statement shared to Instagram on Monday, May 29, that featured an adorable photo of her newborn daughter, Holland, who arrived earlier this month.
"I really struggled in my pregnancy as many of us do. Not just by puking everywhere. I don't miss that. As someone who suffers tremendously from health anxiety, pregnancy shifted everything into overdrive," the 27-year-old model admitted. "Every thought in my head pertained to hurting the baby. Hurting myself. Blame game. I'm doing it all wrong."
Baldwin recounted her journey over the last nine months, describing how she spent her entire pregnancy concerned over what could go wrong. "I read countless pregnancy horror stories and watched negative birthing video after video until I'd go numb from it all. I worried I wouldn't make it through my delivery or something terrible would happen," she admitted.
Disparaged by comments from other women who "would go out of their way to tell me what was going to happen to my body," or "How a baby would negatively impact my relationship... Worse, everyone told me how god awfully painful this whole process and recovery was going to be and how I'll never recognize my body," Baldwin went into the delivery room prepared for the worst.
But when the moment came time to welcome her little one, she said her anxiety "dissolved into nothingness" and that "nothing ever mattered until that moment."
The media personality acknowledged that while not everyone's pregnancy is the same, she wanted to share her experience in hopes "it helps someone even just a little."
"Again, we're all different. Our bodies are different. No one 'wins.' This isn't a contest. But here's what happened to me. Nearly everything everyone told me would happen, didn't," Baldwin continued.
She explained that the delivery was "intense," but said she's "been in worse pain" and that after Holland was born, her fears fled. "I've fallen in love for a second time. I've lost loads of sleep, but I couldn't care less. I could stare at her doing absolutely nothing for hours. A sense of calm has washed over me since her arrival and that has in turn made me feel rested."
Baldwin went on, describing a smooth recovery and absolute awe for her body and what it's capable of. "My body created life," she wrote before gushing over her partner RAC (Andé Allen Anjos) and her care team, which helped her feel so supportive and taught her the importance of breath work.
"I guess my moral here is, you got this. Don't let people tell you how it's going to be. Life is scary and unpredictable and this process was terrifying but it's the greatest thing I've ever done and ever will do," she noted before concluding, "It hasn't been long at all, and I already wish I could stop time."