A Guide to Emotions and Mood Swings During Pregnancy

Wondering what's behind the bouts of crying and flashes of rage? Here's everything you need to know about mood swings during pregnancy.

Medically reviewed by Alyssa Dweck, MS, MD, FACOG

When I was three months pregnant, a slice of cheese made me burst into tears. It wasn't even an actual piece of cheese, it was just the idea of it. I was still in that phase when most foods made me gag, and after I ordered a plain turkey wrap at the diner, I became irrationally convinced that the cook was going to sneak in an unwanted slice of Swiss. As my husband tried to calm me down, I got more upset, convinced that my dinner would be ruined, and he just didn't understand what I was going through!

What happened? I was simply experiencing pregnancy mood swings. The enormous physical and emotional changes, as well as shifting pregnancy hormones, can cause everything from bouts of crying to anger and irritability to forgetfulness.

And while emotions can be challenging to navigate during pregnancy, the good news is, whatever you're experiencing is most likely very normal—and temporary. Learn how pregnancy can affect your emotional state, and get some tips for navigating pregnancy mood swings to feel more like yourself.

First Trimester: Tears and Forgetfulness

As soon as you realize there's a baby in your belly, you may ride a roller coaster of emotions from excitement to fear and delight to worry. Add to that the exhaustion and nausea prevalent in the first trimester, plus a massive surge of hormones, and your moods can swing faster than an Olympic gymnast on the high bar.

"Estrogen and progesterone are skyrocketing at the beginning of your pregnancy," says Lucy Puryear, MD, psychiatrist and author of Understanding Your Moods When You're Expecting. "The changes have big effects on your mood. You can be tearful one minute and happy the next."

Kathleen, a mom of one in New York City, remembers those days well: "I would have what I called 'the 10-minute meltdown,'" she recalls. "All the stress in my life would merge, and I'd sob hysterically for 10 minutes. Then it was over, and I'd happily go on with my day."

Related: Handling a Tough First Trimester of Pregnancy

While the crying jags can be set off by legitimate worries—Can I afford this baby? Will I ever be able to sleep again?—smaller worries can also trigger them (ahem, my cheese breakdown). Pregnant people report bursting into tears over TV commercials, pictures of babies in clothing ads, or an old song on the radio.

"You're wearing your emotions on your fingertips, so you're much more reactive to everything," explains Jennifer L. Hartstein, PhD, a family therapist in New York City. "After your meltdown, you can get freaked out, thinking, 'What is wrong with me?' This will get you upset all over again. Just remember that it's normal, and try to laugh it off and move on."

The early stages of pregnancy can also bring another puzzling symptom, known to some people simply as "baby brain." Progesterone, at sky-high levels during this phase, is a calming hormone, Dr. Puryear explains, but it's also linked to memory.

"When I was pregnant with Parker, I once put my older son Peter's Legos in the refrigerator, and then I tried to serve him a cup of keys to drink!" says Caroline, a mom of two who lives in Oklahoma City.

Related: Explaining the "Mommy Brain" Phenomenon

Second Trimester: Unbridled Giddiness

Many pregnant people start to feel physically better during the second trimester, which can also help boost their mood. Morning sickness may dissipate, you are likely to start to show, and you begin to feel the baby move. The abstract idea of "baby?" may become the exciting idea of "baby!"

Hormones like progesterone and estrogen continue to climb during the second trimester, but your body may be adjusting more to the increase, which can help you feel a bit more balanced.

The second trimester might cause you to do things like beam from ear to ear, laugh out loud in the middle of a dull meeting, or ravish your partner, thanks to increased blood flow through your body that can make you feel more sexual, says Dr. Puryear.

Third Trimester: Crankiness and Power-Nesting

As you get closer to your due date, euphoria may fade as your belly grows, making sleep an ever-challenging task. You may start to worry about the actual mechanics of childbirth ("This has to come out of there?") as well as the huge life changes that are right around the corner. At this point, you might find yourself growing increasingly impatient with everyone, even those closest to you. I am not too proud of the time I insisted my husband go out at 11 p.m. and not return until he found me a chocolate doughnut.

Another common manifestation at this stage is the powerful desire to clean and organize. This is likely due to the biological urge to get ready for your baby's arrival and the increase of oxytocin, the nesting hormone that prepares your uterus for labor and your breasts for lactation.

"Your whole world is about to change, so you think, 'What can I control?'" notes Hartstein. "You're trying to put in order a world that is about to become extremely chaotic." Pregnant people have told me about scrubbing the floor until it shone and refolding every towel in the linen closet.

Sometimes these nesting instincts can take on comic proportions: "About two weeks before I was due, I suddenly decided I had to bake for all the people who would come to see the baby," says Jennifer, a New York mom of one. "I panicked that we would have nothing to feed them, so I spent hours in the kitchen, baking about 12 dozen cookies. We still have some. Want any?"

Related: How to Care for Your Mental Health During Pregnancy

How to Navigate Pregnancy Emotions

First things first, remember that there is no "right" or "wrong" way to feel during pregnancy. Everyone is different, and there are many things that can affect a person's emotions during pregnancy, just as in non-pregnant life.

But if you're feeling frustrated with your own emotions or overwhelmed by mood swings, and you're wondering why you aren't feeling like "yourself," it may help to keep in mind that nearly everything about pregnancy can impact a person emotionally. Here are some strategies that could help if you're feeling ruled by your hormones right now.

Know that your feelings are normal

Whoever said that pregnancy should mean 24/7 bliss was never pregnant. Accept the fact that you will be happy sometimes, stressed out sometimes, and worried other times. Not only is a wide range of emotions normal for pregnancy, but it's normal for life too! Your feelings and emotions during pregnancy have no bearing on what kind of parent you'll be.

Talk to other pregnant people

If you find it helpful, look for a support group in person or online, or make a weekly lunch date with another pregnant friend so you can compare notes and laugh (or cry) together. Browsing threads and hearing other people's experiences with their emotions during pregnancy may just help you feel less alone.

Indulge in some self-care

Yes, you have lots to do, but it might be helpful to block out time to relax by reading a favorite book, scheduling a facial, or getting a pregnancy massage. And of course, self-care looks different for everyone, so by all means, if your self-care means traveling, hitting up a concert, or doing some woodworking, go for it.

Help your partner help you

Instead of becoming angry or frustrated if your partner doesn't instinctively know what to do, it may be helpful to both of you to outline specific ways they could support you. For instance: "Honey, when I am crying, I need you to get me a cup of herbal tea, and then quietly back out of the room."

Seek help when needed

While it can be normal to feel a bit strange during pregnancy, never hesitate to talk to a health care provider if your feelings are affecting your quality of life. "If you're crying consistently and feeling down for more than two weeks without any pleasurable moments in between, or feeling worthless or hopeless, ask your health care provider for help," urges Dr. Puryear, who points out that some people can start having symptoms of postpartum depression before the baby is born.

Keep in mind, too, that pre-existing depression or anxiety might worsen during pregnancy. Medications managing these issues also may need to be altered during pregnancy further contributing to mood changes.

But your mental health is a crucial part of your overall health during pregnancy, so be sure to talk to your doctor about any serious changes you may be experiencing. There is no need to suffer in silence.

Related: What it's Really Like to Feel Depressed During Pregnancy

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