"I'm A Guy, And This Annoys Me": Men And Women Are Sharing The Creepy Things Men Often Do, And As A Woman, I Agree With Several
I think we can all agree that there are a few things some men do that simply make women incredibly uncomfortable — even when the men believe they're doing nothing wrong. So when Reddit user u/coinkeeper8 asked, "What’s something men do that comes across as creepy?" a lot of women (and men!) came forward with their responses. Here's what they had to say below:
1."They sit next to you when you're the only two people in a place with many, many seats."
"I'm a guy, and this annoys me. Hell, it annoys me when there are plenty of parking spaces and someone parks next to me."
2."Hey, where do you work? Oh, which one? Yeah, there's like six of them. Which one do you work at? No, I won't show up at your work. Lol. Hahaha. Hey... Hey... Hey... Did you block me? What did I do wrong?"
3."They stand an inch away from you when you're in a line."
4."Speaking as a 5'2" (1.57) woman, guys you barely know or even total strangers lifting you up off the ground to hug you."
"Or when they constantly make comments about how light you look/small/short you are. 'I can toss you around I bet.' Ewww."
5."I’m a guy but a semi-frequent bar patron. Whenever guys ask bartenders what time they get off that they’ve had little to no interaction with is incredibly creepy. It gives off 'I’ll be waiting for you in the parking lot' vibes."
"It is not even just in bars. I did a summer job in a library and a guy kept asking about my shifts. My male manager had to ask him to leave me alone."
"When I was around 20 or 21 I was working as a barista. We had floor-to-ceiling windows on one side of our café in a busy area. Some guy, (maybe mid-30s) was walking by outside and it looked like he was coming into our store. We locked eyes so I offered a half-hearted customer service smile as one does. He turned the corner to the front of our store (blocked partially by a brick wall, no windows) but never came inside. I didn’t think much of it and just continued on with my day.
About three to four hours later, my shift was over. I walked outside to the parking lot and I heard a “Finally! You’re off work!” I turn around, expecting to see a coworker or maybe a regular customer I was friends with or something.
Nope. It was the guy I locked eyes with for .5 seconds several hours earlier. He was sitting at a table on our patio, but was blocked by the brick wall so I couldn’t see him through the windows from inside the store. I was really startled and didn’t know what to say.
He then proceeded to tell me that he saw me smile at him through the window so decided to WAIT OUTSIDE OF MY WORK FOR SEVERAL HOURS SO HE COULD TALK TO ME! I mean, it would be one thing to come into the store, but a coffee, and try to talk to me (although I still wouldn’t appreciate that while at work) but this man waited outside of my work for several hours.
I was so creeped out and made an excuse like “oh actually I’m just adjusting the umbrellas on the patio. I still have work.” And then I went straight back inside and to the back where I waited for a full hour until my coworkers confirmed he was gone. I was so scared and had male coworkers walk me to my car for like a week."
6."When I was 19, I was a phone girl at a local pizza place. I would answer the phone and take people’s orders for carryout or delivery. One time, this guy called and said he was placing an order for delivery. By the end of the order, he changed his mind and said he wanted to order carry-out. The dude showed up and my coworker helped him and he said, 'You’re not the girl I talked to on the phone. I want to talk to that girl.' I realized he was talking about me, and I asked what was wrong. He then told me he thought I had a really soothing voice and should do ASMR. I was like OK that’s weird but relatively harmless."
"The guy got his food and then left. We could see him sitting in his car for like 15 minutes. Then he came back in the store with a map and started asking me a bunch of weird questions for directions to somewhere. I said, 'Why can’t you just use Google Maps? I see you have an iPhone' and points to his phone. Then as I pointed, I saw him try to hide the screen.
He had the audio recorder pulled up! This weirdo came back into the store with a thinly veiled excuse of asking for directions because he was trying to record my voice! It was so creepy. I told him, 'Wait one second' and went to the back and told some coworkers what was going on. A friend of mine who worked in the kitchen, a 6’2" muscle head walked out and was like: 'I'M GREAT WITH DIRECTIONS. MY GIRLFRIEND IS TERRIBLE AT THEM (while gesturing to me). LET ME HELP YOU!' Suddenly the guy didn’t need directions anymore. So yeah. I’m going to say whatever that was, that was creepy."
7."Touch my waist to move by me. I'll drop-kick you. There is no reason for it, and it makes me irate every single time."
"They always defend it as being non-sexual too. I'll accept that justification when they ever start doing it to men."
8."Ask you out while you are at work or in a situation in which you cannot leave."
"Or if you are a bartender or waitress and they will only tip you if you talk to them or give out your number. Like no, you can keep your tip. I am working — I'm not here to keep you company. You can go find an escort if you want a paid company.
"Example: 'I will give you $20 if you give me your number.'
'I will give you $20 if you tell me your name.'
Or just any scenario where they use tip money to be able to sexualize you."
9."Not backing off when a woman indicates in any way whatsoever verbally or physically she isn’t interested, yet they continue or think they can continue to harass you or change your mind."
"I genuinely have zero ideas how there are guys out there with this much confidence. If I make anything that could even be considered as a move, and I get rejected, then I am getting as far away from that situation as I possibly can immediately and cringing about it in the shower/morning commute for years to come."
10."Telling you to smile."
"When I worked a third shift at a gas station, I used to pull my best Aubrey Plaza deadpan face when men asked me to smile and say some variation of 'I would, but I went through a windshield and my face is paralyzed' and sometimes give my best asymmetrical creepy one eye squinting one eye wide open and twitching ‘attempt’ at a smile. This usually seemed to be a turn-off."
11."Me: 'I'm married.' Shows ring. Random guy: 'I don't believe you. They all say that.' Then it just gets creepy because no matter what you say, they just don't believe anything and keep pressing you to leave with them. That hyper-aggressiveness is creepy."
"I had a guy respond to 'I'm married' with 'Oh, yeah? Where's your husband then?' As if married women are chaperoned by their husbands on every errand."